Hey guys..I've never posted on this board before..generally been on relationships. I came out of a 3 year relationship about 2 months ago (maybe a little more). her decision. A couple of days ago I came back from a backpacking trip to Japan, that I booked to get away from it all. 2 weeks I spent over there with only a backpack and a list of things I wanted to see, no predetermined accommodation, so, it was quite the adventure.

I gained a bit of perspective over there..met a bunch of cool people..the trip was amazing ina lot of ways...but coming back, I still get pangs, and these pangs are making me want to self destruct somehow. Basically at the moment I'm just contemplating going over to Europe or something and living it up until I run out of money and just give up.

I'm dealing the best I can with all the emotions, but they are just coming out in my dreams (dreams about the ex, etc etc). It feels like I have to fight to get anywhere and that I'm being crushed.

Sometimes I just want to snap, put this entire thing behind me, assume an ******* mentality, and keep telling myself I do not care, I do not care, I do not care. has anyone ever done something like that? just snapped and become an entirely different person?

I haven't spoken to the ex since the breakup, and I've made 100% sure, that nobody I know or knows her, will see me down like this. just needed to rant..I'm sick at the moment, so maybe that's whats done my head in.

Katho

Sounds like you're adjusting and adapting...and you're trying to deal with your emotions....not having any contact with the ex....you're having pangs instead of "stabs"......and you're "venting"!! You ARE working thru it....

P.S. For me, things are always ten times worse when I'm sick and don't feel good...I stress and worry more about stuff when in all reality I should be concentrating on resting and getting better!!! I hope you get un-sick soon!!

Choux

Get a grip! Everyone gets their heart broken.

You just have to suffer; don't run away from suffering. Work hard, eat healthily, rest for 8 hours a day.

At some point in the future, the pain will ease, and continue to ease over time.

Best wishes to you in the future.

bluerose

A break-up is like a bereavement, you have to go through a process of adjustment. Don't expect too much of yourself while you are feeling ill. Simply rest as much as you can and take stock when you are feeling better.