ive been feeling really down lately ive got my mom who always is ing at me about everything even the smallest things she is always telling me im going no where in life and im failing out of school and that she dont want me around anymore calls me a all the time and i dunno she is driving me crazy the way that she is always yelling at me and alwaysputting me down. Then there is my dad and he dont give two s he is never around he live 4 hours away and never bothers to call about anything and hardly will oay for child support he does not know me one bit he always buys me stuff that i would never have any intrest in or something for ppl up to 3 years younger than i am he dont even spell my name right. All my life i have just wanted a real family but by the looks of it i will never get one. then there is my friend who i thought was a good friend untill she ed my boyfriend and tried to get me and a few others suspended froms school cause she was scared of our reactions. then there is this guy that means the world to me but he dont even know i exist anymore and there was a time that everything was good with us then his ex came back around and i was not a rebound because i was and ex from 3 years earlier and he had already dated other ppl after that before me. Then there is school no matter what it is to much for me to handle. And last the way i view myself i always think of myself as fat and ugly and all i hate everything about myself i have even tried starving myself but i couldnt do it i dunno i just wish my mom and i were close so that i could talk to her about the way that i feel but i know i could never even try. Ive gotten to the point where im so depressed i have even thought about suiside and it scares the out of me WILL SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME!

Fr_Chuck

Real family, you have one, what you have is about normal for a large part of society, and for many it is worst, if your mom would have had two or three other kids by two or three other guys who also don't come around.

1. Your mom is having all the same problems, your dad does not pay child support so she most likely has a harder time paying the bills.
And she may see alot of her mistakes in things she see you do and wants to try and stop you from making some mistakes she made. And most likely if you think about it, if she did not care, she would not yell, so she may not be the best, but she is one that cares.

As for your dads gifts, he is not part of your life, so to him you are not grown up that much.

Sounds like you want the "Father knows Best" family where dad works, mom is always dressed up and no one ever yells ?? there ain't one like that, parents screw up, get mad and often kids get the blunt of anger about other things. Perhaps something you do reminds mom of your dad and brings up alot of pain, ( not your fault but most likely she has alot of pain also)

Sorry don't know the slang fo what your friend did to or with your boyfriend. But assuming you a younger teen, I know it does not help but boyfriends will come and go over the years.

write it all down, keep a journal of your feelings, your pain and your good times.

Rockabilly1955mama

Honey, you should see your school counselor.

Marriedguy

Cutie08 I read your post and I had to fight back the tears. Please don't think about hurting yourself..sometime life deals you a hard hand but there is still a lot of good hands left to be played. It is very upsetting that your mother would be little you and talk down on you. Where you live is your home it should be a place where you should be safe. I think you may see you not heading in the right direction and the only way she knows how to handle it is to yell and scream. Honestly, I think you need to try to talk her...dont argue but tell her how you feel. I mean she is you mother and I believe people say thinks because there dont really know how it made the other person feel.

I understand that everyone wants to be with someone but I dont think this is the time for you to date. You have a lot of things to deal with and having a boyfriend will only complicate things. So I know its hard but..trust me it will be for the better.

I actually dropped out of High School twice before I went back to finish school. I was not stupid I was just really not focused. When I finally applied myself I graduated with honors. The same can and will happen for you. You just need to apply yourself.

Everyday is a change to start a new life and a new beginning.

I'll post again I have more to say.

stick_labuf

I have been there before. And have made attempts. Without going into my story...I can only tell you this: Get help! Tell someone...anyone (preferrably in person)...about these new feelings. Go see your doctor (that was my 1st step). If this is too hard...have someone take you. Talk to them, they may recommend therapist or an antidepressent, or both. Do whatever it takes to get better. It will not be easy (took me 9 months...and counting) but I'm glad I was not successful and look at everyday as a day to do something great.

ginaconti1

You are what you think about all day long. I felt depressed growing up and I found that finding something to do and getting really good at it brought me confidence and helped me escape from thinking about what ever it was that was making me sad. I also realized that I could not find happiness in another person. I first had to enjoy being in my own skin. I am not sure what you do for yourself, but you can only do so much for the outside, but you can take good care of yourself and feel better by doing so. when you take pride in YOU other people will too. Sometimes people, even our family let us down, but there is always someone who lifts us up...these types of folks are who you should hang around. Hang in there!!!! I will believe for you that you will see some positive things in your life. xxx gina PS you can listen to one of my songs on youtube under ginaconti1 singing is how i relieve the pain inside.