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my bf says hes a sociopath. it makes sense i guess. how do i deal with this. because iv'e had enough now where i could almost leave him. At the same time is it right to leave him just because of that?
Posted by: Anonymous
I had a child with a sociopath. He's already used the courts to harass, abuse and control me. He's able to convince lawyers, guardian ad litem and judge, despite having his ex-wife on my side and taking excellent notes of things that happened. How can I protect myself and my child in the future from this monster?
Posted by: Anonymous
Hi Beth911. You seem to have some really messed up people in your life. It must be a lot for you to take in. I hope you are OK! You know, if you are with a sociopath... You may need to think about if its gonna work out. You said
Quote:
I've had enough now where I could almost leave him
It seems to me you know the end is inevitable, but the timing just is not good and/or you still have that attached love and loyalty. I did some research on this after reading your question, and I think everyone has a little sociopath in them. But if you get one person with an abundance of those traits you are looking at a very serious problem. It seems to me that the majority need to drag people down with them, and when they reach bottom they thrive again to do it to someone else. It seems to me also that they are survivors, having little empathy for the damage they cause. I see that it is a selfish disease, if I were you I would move on. I'm a loyal guy, but even you said you've almost had enough. Big ups and downs are something he may be used to, but to bring you down with him would hurt you a lot more than it would ever hurt him. Maybe when you leave him you can give him the reasons, maybe reference some form of therapy he can get. It might take a lot for him to admit that he is a sociopath, or he's a sociopath that can see the end of your relationship coming and he may be using it as an excuse/reason for mistreating you. Over all, you are a compassionate caring girl who a sociopath learns to attract. Very charming in public and to friends & family (at first) But you will leave him one day, its just a matter of when you find the courage.
this is messed up.. just read these so you get the idea of how i'm being treated. these are messages he sent me..
Honestly? I don't have feelings for you. The only reason im with you still is to humor you. I know you won't get better, and you won't change. But I'll let you beleive you will, and I'll stay with you until I find the right person
you dont deserve respect or love. you dont do anything to deserve it
your lucky I accept you and am seen with you. You arn't fit to scrape the dirt from my shoes
and with that, im off
then he said hes been wanting to leave for the past 10 months and all kinds of
i told him its his decision and i dont really care. but this is it.
he gets mad at me for ignoring him.
when i talk about things they arent important enough for him
i try to leave him alone but when i finally get thr stregth to do that he keeps telling me to make up my mind. when i already say no he still tells me that. if i say yeah he still says that.
i cant get away from him. i would still want to b with him but i know hes never gonna change and i dont wanna be with someone who treats me that way.
Honey, the way he is talking to you is called verbal abuse. Verbal abuse often eventually turns into physical abuse. You should run, not walk, away from this guy. Have you ever thought about giving counseling a try? It can be a really big help when you have to leave a relationship. It helps you learn about healthy relationships and how to deal with feelings about this guy.
You are absolutely right when you say "i know he's never gonna change". Sadly, people usually don't. I've seen people make the mistake of trying to "fix" someone in the relationship, and in the end, that person usually dragged the other person down instead of changing their behavior. It would be great if he did change someday, but he obviously isn't now, and you have to do what is healthy for you.
I know it's hard to leave someone, but sometimes that is the best thing for yourself. What if it escalates from verbal to physical? I think talking to a counselor might really help. If you don't want to pay for counseling, consider talking to a relative, good friend, or a religious leader (if that applies to you). And of course, you call always come here for support!
So, if you do distance yourself from him, he contacts you and tells you you can't make up your mind? Make up that mind. Arrange things so that he can not get close enough to tell you things that twist your brain, cause pain and confusion. That is not a good relationship! But, then you knew that already.
Love him. But take care of yourself. Love yourself enough to get away from his manipulation of your thoughts and emotions. Love yourself enough to be able to really love him. You need to know all about verbal abuse, and why people do it. Find out why you keep spending time with him when he beats you up with words and attitude every single time.
i cant leave him. i try. and i'm fine with it but this time, he still tries talking to me. yet he says he doesnt like me and that he won't give me any more chances. then why does he keep talking to me and why cant he just leave me alone?
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