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    polska's Avatar
    polska Posts: 33, Reputation: 6
    Junior Member
     
    #1

    Jul 14, 2008, 04:12 PM
    I am feeling very lonely and depressed.
    Some of you may recognize me from some of my postings on relationships.
    If I look back at my life even just a year ago, I was very active and not feeling so depressed. I own a business that's doing well, I have several great hobbies, I have great friends. The average person would say " Why are you so depressed?" Well... I am!
    I went through a bad breakup at the beginning of April that pretty much crippled me.
    I have been seeing a therapist for a few months now and that seems to help sometimes.
    I started working out, getting in shape, I am a 14 week non-smoker now after 20 years, I was feeling a lot better. This woman that dumped me is still very much in my head.
    The past week or so has been horrible. I don't even want to leave the house. All I want to do is lay around and be lazy. I feel extremely lonely now. I have had long periods of being single and was very much o.k. with it. But now its terrible. I'm 36 and feel like I'm running out of time. ( You older folks reading this are probably all chuckling right now)
    I am just not happy at all with myself right now. I'm afraid of getting on medication.
    Somebody cheer me up PLEASE!
    ylaira's Avatar
    ylaira Posts: 1,193, Reputation: 118
    Ultra Member
     
    #2

    Jul 14, 2008, 04:31 PM
    Im sorry to hear your story. You're heartbroken now and I don't think there's even a joke or a word can ever make your feeling away in a snap. If you can, try to put up a project so you'll be occupied on something worthwhile. Just come here often and we'll be here for you. You are not alone, everybody has their story of heartache. Also visit the Humor & Comedy posts here.
    oliverma08's Avatar
    oliverma08 Posts: 3, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #3

    Jul 14, 2008, 04:32 PM
    Hey I have been there myself lately and it is a lonely place to be but whatever you do DON'T give up on yourself. I have been married for 23 years and my husband left me for someone he worked with. It has taken me over 8 months to realize that your happiness don't depend on that person that you are so much in love with because if they don't feel the same way or in my case he walked away from that hard core love that everyone else dreams about there is really nothing you can do to change their minds. Just pick yourself up and continue to live your life, make yourself happy and everything else will fall into place. Trust me. The best revenge is for the other person to see that they can't hold you back. 8 times of 10 they will more likely realize what they let go. It may be too late or you will never know... because no matter what there is always HOPE that holds on. The best thing you could do for yourself right now is realize that you can't change anyone but you can change yourself. So live it up and be happy... You are still very young (I know because I am only 39, and I am looking at 40 as the new 20's) lol, so get out there and enjoy life... Life is too short to be sad, depressed and lonely... Best wishes.
    Choux's Avatar
    Choux Posts: 3,047, Reputation: 376
    Ultra Member
     
    #4

    Jul 15, 2008, 03:17 PM
    It is normal to be lonely and miserable after a breakup with a partner who really meant a lot to a person in more ways than love. It just takes *time* to get over the unhappiness and heartbreak, time. Almost all of us have to endure this kind of misery in our lives... but, it does heal but leaves us altered for the better.

    Just guard against quick fixes such as drinking alcohol or entering into any kind of addictive behavior. Go about your life every day... job, hobbies, sports, intellectual interests... whatever. Make sure you cry and express your emotions... get them out of you or they will make you sick in the long run.

    Your friends are being insensitive, let out your emotions with the therapist.

    If you do the above, your misery won't last forever... remember that. It may last through Christmas, but it *won't last forever*.

    You can make it.
    Anna2112's Avatar
    Anna2112 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #5

    Jul 10, 2010, 04:37 PM
    Dear Polska,

    Sincerely, I don't know and I can't say anything that would cheer you up... but I can surely tell you something true.
    This feeling you have won't pass that easy and soon. But in time, you will surely get used to it, you will learn how to live with it. Till one day, when you'll realise that the pain has diminuished and that you have the right and power to be happy again.

    But for now, just give yourself time to evaluate all your feelings, good or bad. The most important thing is to find your peace of mind and spirit, don't lose yourself. Spend the time only for yourself, to regain your trust and optimism... because for each tear there's a smile out there. And you should smile again because someone could fall in love with your smile. Someone who's the true one this time.

    I do understand you. The man I was supposed to marry this year left me a few months ago, on the 5th of January, when we were coming back from Rome where we spent our last new year's eve together.
    I'm still fighting with the pain inside me... but I don't want to give up. And neither should you!

    One more thing, remember that everything in life happens with a very reason.

    Wishing you to find true happiness,

    Anna
    colbycheese's Avatar
    colbycheese Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #6

    Jan 2, 2011, 04:36 PM
    Its funny how people can be lonely even married as myself. I have no friends other than my wife I don't know anyone and never figured out why I can't make friends. I'm 57 and feel horrible I've never been able to break this cycle I just try to deal with it I have fought depression all my adult life and I'm a very likeable person but can't make friends to hang with. I work a full time job go to work and come home repeat the same thing every day . I can't never feel good allways have a cloud over my head . I never loved life and allways feel it's a punishment to be here I'm married 25 years this time and 7 years on my first marriage . ( I know you don't want a sob story ) but wanted to let you know lots of people feel like this . Now 25 years later don't feel any better just added 25 more years to my miseralble life and I love my wife very much . So try to answer this . My best way to describe myself is like a infant in a mans body infants can't make decisions . I've got into the bible real heavy and still read every day but nothing ever helps . Of course your depression is because you lost your love not born with it . I see you wrote this in 08 2 years ago you may be married to her now or someone else .
    Take care dave
    taketime's Avatar
    taketime Posts: 1, Reputation: 0
    New Member
     
    #7

    Oct 13, 2011, 09:05 PM
    Colybcheese- you just described me to a "T" there is nothing worse than feeling lonely.. I feel such a void in my life and feel completely unable to connect with anyone -even my own family -it's devastating some time and I wonder if Life is even worth living and just yesterday realize -this just might be pergatory.
    I wish I could look forward to the future -but when I do - I just see more of this feeling for years to come.
    I was at work the other day and we were playing a 'get to know you" type game where you have to answer questions annonmysouly and then everyone has to guess which person said it. One of the questions was " If you could meet anyone in the world- who would it be" And everyone was saying " Steve Jobs, Oprah etc.. " and all I could think was " A friend"... I really wish I could just meet a friend.
    I desperately wish I could snap out of it,but everything feels grey -and I don't really want to be around any longer and sadly I pray to be taken early.

    I wish you all the luck in the world and hope you find some light in your life. I don't think it will come to you - you will have to make the effort to make it happen.
    It's nice having someone to chat with who feels the same way - thank you for finding the courage to write how you felt.
    lonelyirishman's Avatar
    lonelyirishman Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #8

    Nov 4, 2011, 06:23 PM
    I feel the same.. dont want too be here any longer I am 37 this weekend and I have nobody yoo be with..
    I haven't had a hug in a very long time.. I feel so alone I have no girlfriend not even a friend too talk too..
    Its very frighting.I believe what one of the comments says that this is pergotory .ill go a bit more and says it hell living hell.I don't have the will too live any longer and as I type this I am crying.. I don't want too be alone..
    waterbabymaui's Avatar
    waterbabymaui Posts: 1, Reputation: 0
    New Member
     
    #9

    Nov 6, 2011, 07:46 PM
    Well maybe you should look to God! It's been a little over 2 years that I've been single after a 10 year relationship. It was a very bad break up but it is what it is! He betrayed me but with God in my life we are OK with each other (we're not best friends) and it feels good to not hate him! My point is I was so broken that after 6 months of partying my *** off I was still lost, depressed, and lonely and with God in my life it helps. Good luck to you and blessings!
    Krushnal's Avatar
    Krushnal Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #10

    Jan 25, 2012, 05:29 AM
    Well, the same is the problem for me. But there's an exception. You all are old enough, but I'm 14, Just 14 years old. Please help me with this.
    ritta's Avatar
    ritta Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #11

    Apr 2, 2012, 05:05 AM
    I like this so much, it works. In addition make yourself busy with somestuff . I am sure you will forget everything that makes you depressed.
    hinajee's Avatar
    hinajee Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #12

    Apr 21, 2012, 09:12 AM
    I feel sad and alone in this western world.
    cs408's Avatar
    cs408 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #13

    Apr 23, 2012, 03:35 PM
    I am nineteen years old and attending university. After ending a long- term relationship before hand I thought I would start a new chapter in my life. Sometimes this is not the best idea. I am depressed and have suffered from bulimia for two years, and have only just started getting my life back on track. The best advice I can give is to talk to someone about it before it gets too much. I have often had suicidal thoughts, but since I realised that something was not right I peeled myself from the bed (and the Haagen Dazs) and dragged myself to the doctors. I was immediately given anti-depressants and councilling. Councilling does not work for everbody, but even if you don't feel like the sort of person who can talk to a stranger face to face about your problems then please use a blog. The internet is a great place to talk to people about your problems, its 24 hours and everyone is anonymous. The best advice that I can give is to take ONE DAY AT A TIME. If you aim to do one thing everyday, even if it is just putting the washing in the machine, then you will gradually get back into the swing of things and feel like yourself once again. Best of luck and I hope my advice is of use.
    b3k's Avatar
    b3k Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #14

    May 9, 2012, 01:01 AM
    I'm crying over something as dumb as Facebook. My best friend and I aren't talking and its been months & right now I need her but I allowed my stubbornness get in the way of our friendship. Now I'm sad & crying because a guy I want doesn't think I'm pretty enough & has deleted me from Facebook, I hate that I care at all. I'm usually a strong person so I'm going to let myself cry and then pick up the pieces, not give up on life.
    inventinfosys's Avatar
    inventinfosys Posts: 1, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #15

    May 11, 2012, 07:14 PM
    For everyone who is lonely and depressed: I have been there and felt that... just don't let yourself feel like its going to be like that forever. Trust me on this... it will all be over before you know it!! Especially if you feel lonely after a breakup... If someone broke your heart, they are not worth it right?. so what's the point in feeling bad!. I think you should feel good that now you are in a better position than before!. god is great
    niki22's Avatar
    niki22 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #16

    May 19, 2012, 12:45 AM
    I am very much depressed right now. So I tried to find something related to depression and loneliness and found this blog. It is indeed surprising to see many people facing some or other issue in life.
    madame2003's Avatar
    madame2003 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #17

    Sep 2, 2012, 07:20 PM
    Hope you are feeling better. Your age is a tough one, but you too, will make it through. Please ask for help from an older friend, counselor, therapist, relative, etc. get to the bottom of your sadness now. You have a great productive life ahead of you. Sending hugs to you.
    nashwahamid's Avatar
    nashwahamid Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #18

    Nov 3, 2012, 01:20 PM
    Just want to wish you a happy birthday to you. Tomorrow's a new day, a new beginning and a new year added to your life, a new hope and a white page in your life, another chance to start a new.


    Happy birthday will all of my best wishes to you. God bless you!

    Your friend,

    Nash.
    redlesta1's Avatar
    redlesta1 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #19

    Jul 21, 2013, 07:28 PM
    I am pretty much the same have always been single and I'm 36 now.
    I have even questioned my sexuality and have always been very shy all my life so making friends is a nightmare.
    I have felt like suicide especially in my last job which is over 3 years go now.
    Now I don't even bother to get up most days and don't take care of myself at all.
    Everyone I think is lonely in a way in life because its so mundane.I hate myself.
    Levin's Avatar
    Levin Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #20

    Oct 16, 2013, 10:11 AM
    Open yourself up, get out and hit the street, go to the place where there are people, a coffee shop would be good, feel and sense the people around, feel the ambience, feel the flesh air, the good environment, you would feel a sense of confidence, hope, good hope. Observe the people passing by... feel them, figure out how they live their lives, you can know, you should know you are not alone, you are not the worst, feel the comradeship of the sufferings, lonely? You are not alone, it is universal. This is not a perfect world, but then as long as we are still alive, it is good to cheer up, it is good to have hope, it is good to live it up, consciously choose to be so because you are not alone, you have suffering buddies, tell yourself, wisper to yourself that it is better to live up than slip sliding away. Yes it is better, you have choice, make the choice to hope for something better, nicer... and with this, like a little shoot, it would grow, taller, stronger and bigger and you would be good then. Always remember you dictate your own, you are the boss of your own life, your are the master, you can be what you want to be.

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