How do we,who need to take medications daily,stay compliant,(take them as prescribed) and why do we go off them, knowing the results if we do.

J_9

Good, I'm glad you got a doc who listens. That is very important. Some docs just think that the world revolves around them.

Oh, yeah, I was gonna go lay down. Toodles.

KBC

OK,I am feeling very homicidal tonight,have been for about,ummm, a few days now,since preacherman judged my response to the post,man did that upset me,now I have gotten many PM's and other posters showing their support.

It's becoming an obsession, this hatred, I am even bringing it up in my support groups, My buddy is rolling his eyes at my repeated stories, same theme, different day...

My daughter is driving me batty also, I wonder if it is all me and my perspective, or a few situational processes which combined are becoming a larger stress issue.

Maybe its just that I am becoming more critical of the world as a whole, I haven't been able to find the answers yet, my mind clouds with fury when I think about most of this for too long, my heart beats strong and hard for release, release of anger and violence.

Soon I believe, I will either act-out , someway, and either become depressed(feeling guilty for doing something I probably shouldn't do) or the other swing, go high road manic and get hospitalized( that hasn't been my way for over 20 years though)It feels as though it is coming to a head.

Tomorrow, I see the mad doc,,,OH I mean Med doc,,,and will bring this post in with me, just to see what he suggests,who knows , he might have a solution for this madness.

J_9

Ken, I am so sorry you are feeling like this, but you know that acting out would be wrong. What would it solve other than you getting into trouble?

I understand that it's hard going through a time like this, it really is, but you know as well as I do that acting out would serve no real purpose.

We all get critical from time to time, that's goes for all of us. Yes, you can blame it on the depression, but is that what it really is? Nah, I feel like that too once in a while.

Maybe you will go high road, I hope not. I hope you don't take either path, but stay on the straight and narrow.

I haven't read the thread that upset you so much. But there have been some for me too that upset me beyond belief. But I have to remember that these are just words on a screen and if the people actually KNEW me, they may not say what they say.

There is a certain degree of "comfort", if you will for lack of a better word, for people to post just anything they want to say, not taking feelings into account, at a place like this. And I have to remember that when people get me riled up. Sometimes it's just better to walk away for a short time.

Please keep me posted as to what the Med Doc says tomorrow. Lucky you have one that will listen.

KBC

Tomorrow is today...lol

Again my sleep was short lived and we're gonna have a change of meds, I just feel it coming on.

3 hours and counting, not like it is gonna be a cure all, just to be heard by a professional, in a face to face, there is a certain clarity and security in seeing someone treating you in person.

This isn't saying I don't appreciate you J.

Trust me, You are a great help for me in AMHD,I value your input and advice greatly.

I'll post what I get answers to today,Open mind,willing,accepting,honest,,,My mantra before seeing the pros...

Had a few hours sleep and need more, just not yet.

Hope the test is awesome for you today(I think I saw that somewhere else on site)you'll do great.

Thank you for your support,

Ken

J_9

Oh, tomorrow is today, see how tired I am from studying, I didn't even look at the post time, silly me.

Ken, I know you are very appreciative, I hope you didn't take what I said wrong. I know you are.

I hope everything went well today, please keep me posted.

asking

I did it again. I took a half a methadone tablet to the kitchen to take it with water this morning, had a bowl of cereal and never took the methadone. By noon I was in withdrawal and feeling overwhelmed. I felt like I would never be able to cope with all the things I have to do--write a book, take care of my kids, manage my finances, etc. I finally took "another" half pill, feeling angry with myself for my weakness in having to take more than my allotted dose. I then slept for two hours, got up and was able to function and pay bills, talk to my son when he got home from school. Later, I found the pill I hadn't taken.
Oh.
I proceeded to blame myself for that too. Not allowed to make mistakes. I have been coming back here to see how KBC is doing. Well, I hope.
Asking

KBC

Wrong? I don't think so, respecting friends opinions is a good sign of recovering,'constructive criticism' is commonplace, and necessary.Is all good over here

My therapist was out sick, but the replacement was a really awesome guy, we hit it off right off the bat, DR was typically quick and to the point, prescribed ABILIFY along with the rest of the meds I am on, No other changes yet.

They are loathe to give scrips for adavan being the nature of the controlled substance.(It works, in other words, and the system doesn't want that out...cynical me)

Worked 12 hours yesterday, and slept 12 hours on the meds, feel groggy today, but have to press on,things to do, people to see, places to go...

I'll be back on soon enough, and I hope you did well on the latest test J_9, And thanks for your support,

Ken

J_9

Abilify huh? And you are wanting Ativan? Hmmm, Abilify is much stronger.

Glad to hear you finally got 12 hours of sleep, it's about time isn't it?

Well, I just popped in to get your update.

Test went very well hopefully. I was the first done in the class and that NEVER happens. The only thing that bothers me is that whenever I feel I do really well, I fail the test. When I feel that I failed it, I ace it. Scores are usually in by 4 pm that day, but we won't be getting our scores until later this morning.

Take care Ken, I won't be on today as I it is Tuesday and I will be in clinicals until 5:30

Glad everything went well for you.

KBC

Hi, Asking!!!

I'll kick ya if you like,,,

I haven't missed med times very often this round,once or twice,mostly the Depakote, being an extended release I was able to take it without overlapping(at least I believed it...hmmmm)
No bad side effects with them so far.

One or another med has made me forgetful, I need a definite time when I take these buggers, so I don't miss any, 6 am and 6 pm, if at all possible thats seems to be good times( one other med is at noon also)

I hope you don't have too many more days missed, it's only human to miss one or two, but again I can kick you if you'd like, share the love...

Seriously, it's only a lesson learned and I hope you don't berate yourself that much.

Thanks for looking in,

Ken

J_9

Abilify huh? And you are wanting Ativan? Hmmm, Abilify is much stronger.

Glad to hear you finally got 12 hours of sleep, it's about time isn't it?

Well, I just popped in to get your update.

Test went very well hopefully. I was the first done in the class and that NEVER happens. The only thing that bothers me is that whenever I feel I do really well, I fail the test. When I feel that I failed it, I ace it. Scores are usually in by 4 pm that day, but we won't be getting our scores until later this morning.

Take care Ken, I won't be on today as I it is Tuesday and I will be in clinicals until 5:30

Glad everything went well for you.