When I meet my husband I wan't that into him or any other man for that fact. I was content just living my life without one. I know that I was a little mean to him in the beginning, but he was persistent and finally won me over with his patience and kindness. When I finally fell in love with him, he started being very possesive and always accused me of cheating with his friends, something I would never do. 1.5 years later we were still together and I was getting sick of him always accusing me of everything under the sun. I went away to another state for a few weeks to help my mother out and ran into a childhood friend. Went on a few dates, no sex just kissing. Realized that I did want to be with my boyfriend back home and broke it off. We wound up getting married and I told him about this other guy 2 years later because my conscious was not at ease. We got through it then, but from time to time he brings it up and everything else that he thought I was doing and brutally disrespects me. We have been married for almost three years and I am really getting sick and tired of defending myself. I admitted what I did wrong, but he feels that I did a lot worse to him as far as sleeping with his friend and things... horrible things that I would never be capable of doing. I understand that these outbursts are from him hurting, but I am hurting too! I am a good woman and a good wife to him. When it is good between us it is very good and we are in love, but when it is bad it is a total nightmare. I am 36 years old and he is 29, I am tired of dealing with this, but truly love him and I know that he loves me, but can we ever get past the past?