Hello All,

I just found this group this eveing I have an issue where I can use a little advise if any one can help.

Ok here goes.

A little about me My name is steve I and am 25 years old. My Parents are both loving and caring I come from a 3 person family meaning I am a only child My girlfirend/Fiancé have been together this year on and off again she comes from a devorice of little over a year now and has 2 girls. She is my HS sweetheart and back then we were together for 3 years. Its been 6 years since we splt and now this year we have been together and broken up due to mis issues mostly caused by Her deviorce and feelings that go with the devorce I have always thought over the years that she is the one for me. Now here is the question.

How do I tell my parents and how do I deal with the fall out that will come my parents you see don't excatly feel that she is good for me. I love her deeply with all my heart. I accept her and her girls as my own. Can any one give me some advice...


Thanks in advance


Steven

lady

Hi Steve
Just Go with your heart,it always seems to know what is best for us,even when we think different.If you parents love you they will love her as well. As for the kids do your best and love them like your own and everything will work out.Thanks Lady

Taodesuki

You have to remember two things:

One - you are an adult, not a child.

Two - you are the one living your life, not your parents.

If it feels right to you then do it! Don't let her past stand in your way. Divorce does create difficult situations but they can be overcome with a little patience and love. And although I am sure that you respect your parents, you should realize that you are the only one that can make you happy.

If your parents don't accept her then that's okay, that's life. If you were 16 and they didn't like your choices that would be one thing - but your not. If you feel like this girl is the one for you then you should act on it and not let their feelings on the subject cast a black cloud over your relationship with her.

Perhaps in order for them to start accepting this relationship you need to take it seriously first. If you guys have been breaking up because of their disapproval then they will continue to try and exert influence over you - in the hopes that you'll just let her go and forget it.

Once you make the statement that you guys are together and its staying that way they will have to change their tune. You might have a close bond with your parents but it is time for you to start your own life and they have to be willing to accept you, regardless of your choices.

You and this girl really need to sit down and decide where this is going. You mentioned that kids are involved - this may make your parents nervous or they may think that she is just trying to trap you. But only you know how you really feel - and so this is your decision.

Work things out with her - talk open and honestly about how you feel and what things you'll face together - work on the trouble spots as a team. If you love her and her children, then I don't see why you can't make it into a real relationship if you try hard enough.