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fouzia nishath · May 29, 2007, 12:24 AM

My husband says no for every thing.I asked his to take to the movie he says no.I asked him to take me to fun park.he says no.I wanted to join gym he says no.I wanted to go to US from company for that also he says no.I don't no what wrong with him.I think he doesn't love me any more.its just 5 month since we are married.ours is an arrange marriage.please help

brandy681 · May 29, 2007, 01:17 AM

I have been with my boyfriend for 7 years and we live together, like we are married. He has been acting like this for most of the whole relationship but he will occasionally take me to the movies and spend time together but not near as much as I would like. All my boyfriend does is work and stay home basically! Have you heard the phrase I cheated because you never do anything with me and your not there for me? Of course I never cheat on my boyfriend and I am totally faithful but sometimes guys will be like this after a while in the relationship. I can't say that my boyfriend NEVER wants to go no where with me because we go on vacations sometimes and we go out sometimes but not as much as I would like. I think we go out together maybe 1 time a week, sometimes twice in a week but that is about it! I don't think that your marriage is on the rocks but guys can get like this sometimes.. If I ask my boyfriend to take me to the movies, dinner, shopping, carnival, etc most of the time he sais no or he sais that I can go by myself because he is is too tired, etc. I don't feel that I have a bad relationship with my boyfriend because we have deep love for each other and we don't fight hardly at all but I think that we could do more things together but I am basically used to it now. We usually go out on Fridays to dinner and a movie and that is about it, sometimes if my boyfriend has more time off then we do more but it is usually what my boyfriend wants to do more than what I want to do. I do feel for you and know what you are going through and you need to talk to your husband about and let him know what you feel about this but I do think that he still loves you a lot!

JoeCanada76 · May 29, 2007, 01:18 AM

That's the problem. Arranged marriages. Might be considered good for your culture but in my culture there is nothing good that comes from an arranged marriages. How do you expect love when it was arranged.

Joe

brandy681 · May 29, 2007, 01:33 AM

Oh.. I didn't know that this was an arranged marriage. I do personally know a few (asian) couples that have been through this and it is indeed hard. One friend who's parrents made him marry a women and when she came to the states they did nothing together! I mean he left her at home all of the time and basically acted as though he was still single and never took her any where. In all honsety he never wanted to get married but his parents made him. I felt so bad for the poor girl, I haven't seen them in a few years but I don't know how that marriage could have worked. Another guy that I know chose a women to marry by a picture, I guess she was bought or what ever you want to call it but he sent her family money in another country and she finally got to come to the states. I think that he was used because she wanted to come here because soon after they divorced. I think arranged marriages are more common then people realize and it is terrible!

danielnoahsmommy · May 29, 2007, 05:32 AM

What ever happened to marriage counseling.

DaTruth123 · May 30, 2007, 10:12 AM

BY your husband saying no to everything really dont mean he's not in love with you anymore. Maybe you need to make the first move just get a day you know that he's not tired or anything and take him there. If you think that won't work rent some movies at home spice it back up. 5 months is not that long to be married you guys are still newleyweds tell him how important it is to you if you could go out with me today.