Hi!
I am 16 and my boyfriend is 21, we have been together for 1 year. He is Asian and has recently experienced certain difficulties that have led to the involvement of the immigration department. He may be deported. We both agree that the only way that he will be able to stay in or return to this country would be if we were to get married when I turn 18. I love him very much and he is adament that he feels the same. However, he is a Muslim; a faith wherein getting married at a young age is relatively common and the marriages often do survive,and so he feels more secure about this than I do.

I would be eternally appreciative of any advice that anyone has to offer.

Jesushelper76

I have heard a story about some adults pressuring a younger person to get married with her cousin so he can stay in a certain country. Even though they might think it is normal or right. I thought that it was a worse Idea just to get married to somebody to help out family members. At the same time you say that your in love and he is in love with you so that is different. I think that it would be important to get married because you truly want to be with each other for life not just to keep him in the country. If you are uncomfortable with this then maybe you should wait and think it through. I can not tell you what to do, that is only up to you. Remember the reason for getting married will effect wheather it will be a long term marriage or not. Just my opinion.

Joe

*Judith*

sorry i didnt realise that my previous post had been trecieved please ignore this

CaptainForest

I am hesitant about mentioning this to you, but I will in the interest of full disclosure.

You don’t have to wait until you are 18 to marry him.

Many places allows a 16 or 17 year old to get married, as long as they have the written permission of their parents or legal guardians.

So you probably could get married now if your folks agree to it.


That being said, I don’t think you should. Getting married to keep someone in the country is usually not a good reason to get married.

Why is he having troubles? Has it gotten himself involved with some crime?

If you marry him now just to keep him in the country, then odds are this marriage won’t last and in the long run it will cost you way more…lawyer’s fees, etc.

If he is to be deported, then so be it. Don’t rush your life in order to help him.


You are only 16….and most marriage at a young age, do NOT work out.