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First let me apologize if this is too long or annoying, I just really need help. To sum this up my parents have been married for about 20 years now. I am their oldest child (male, 16) and there's my little sister (14).
My dad went on holiday for about 2 weeks and came back 2 days ago. He told me now that I have the choice to either stay with my mother or with him because he's intent on getting a divorce and that's it.
He says it just can't work out anymore between them and this is it. However from september to december my parents were at war about divorcing.
My dad got my mum kicked out the house by the police, he wanted to divorce her and she didn't want to. My dad was going to marry some other women but in the end he realised she was a crazy b*tch and my parents reconciled in december.
Anyway you're probably thinking my dad is a b*stard or something but that's not true and well what happened is done and it just happened so nevermind.
My mum thinks that he is trying to get a divorce for another woman (who is presumably in England).
The thing is we live in Austria right now and if I chose to stay with my father I can go and live in England (where my dad's from). I'm english but I never had the chance to live there before.
If I chose to stay with my mother I have to go and live with her in Syria (where she's from).
I'm torn between the two and don't know what to do.
Can anyone help me? This isn't a funny subject and I need help from experts who know what they're talking about.
As the youngest of a bunch of 5 kids and having to walk in on my dad cheating on my mom wasnt easy and it didnt make it easier to find out they are getting a divorce. Yes its hard but for sum they just face it unlike for me i was given a decision also but i took a stand dont let them make you choose tell them strait up im not going to decide one parent over another you two made this decision so you two can fix it and if you think seperation is really the answer then your only thinking of yourselfs not others around you or how it would effect your kids so the best thing to do is just keep an open mind about it dont be affraid to talk about it to your parents and also its good to keep a good friend,brother,or even a sister to stick by you and talk to .. it helps keep your mind off things
I say dont decide. Dont let them make you decide. They are both your parents and have been there for you since you were born, the best thing to do is dont get stressed or go into depression because you cant decide. Just dont choose at all!
My mother thinks that I shouldn't decide and I should make my dad understand that I shouldn't have to go anywhere or decide anything.
Damn this whole story sucks. My mother is trying to reconcile but my dad just doesn't want to and is sticking with his belief that "it just can't work anymore after 20 years of fighting".
I have to admit they ALWAYS fight, like all the time. Not everyday but very often and it got ugly a couple of times.
I'm not sure what I want to do. I guess staying here is the best cus I'm used to it but I'd also like to live in England cus I want to, it's my damn country.
My mother thinks that I shouldn't decide and I should make my dad understand that I shouldn't have to go anywhere or decide anything.
Damn this whole story sucks. My mother is trying to reconcile but my dad just doesn't want to and is sticking with his belief that "it just can't work anymore after 20 years of fighting".
I have to admit they ALWAYS fight, like all the time. Not everyday but very often and it got ugly a couple of times.
I'm not sure what I want to do. I guess staying here is the best cus I'm used to it but I'd also like to live in England cus I want to, it's my damn country.
-Xm8
I know you are being put in a very difficult position and I hope you have good friends who can help you though this tough time.
My sister is kind of... alien to this whole thing. She hugs my mother etc when she cires and is very supportive but she basically seems to be in her own world right now and doesn't mind much I guess. If she had to take a side, she would take my mother's I think, but she loves both parents equally just as I do.
And like you said I think England would be better for me, but I'm not so keen of living with only one parent. I know I'm supposed to act my age and be cool with whatever happens but it is kind of hard.
I imagine it is difficult, and divorce is hard on everyone. Adjustments will have to be made. And some hard choices for sure. But you can still love your family, whether they are together or not, no matter the circumstances.
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