At Ask Me Help Desk you can ask questions in any topic and have them
answered for free by our experts. To ask questions or participate in
answering them you must register for a free account. By registering you
will be able to:
Get free answers from experts in any of our 300+
topics.
Hello,
I have been married for close to 3 years now, we really dont have any issues within us at all. We are happy in all possible ways. We are emotionally attached, we are sexually happy. But yes because of my work nature i am unable to spend time with my wife as much as before. Also recently i have come across a women at work who has come really close to me; she knows me very well, knows that i am married and happy with my relation with my wife as well. My wife also knows her as a very good friend of mine. She has been telling that she loves me, and she loves me like crazy. We have even spend very intimate moments and made love couple of times as well. Now she is going to get married. I am getting emotionally involved cos i have also started to Love her. I love my wife as well, cos she is very good at heart and understands me well. I just want to understand how do i handle this situation, when the other lady in my life is going to get married but still promises to love me in the same way. What kind of a relation will that be? I am doing right but getting involved with her? If i get out of the relationship will it hurt her? It will be difficult for me to just get out if this cos i also love her. Please help me!!
What kind of a relation will that be? What kind of relationship is it N0W!
The difference will be she will be married T00 and so she will be cheating on a husband just like you are cheating on a wife.
What to do!??? Since you love her and she loves you. Get her bf and your wife together and ditch the two of them so you can be together with the 'other woman'. Then your wife has somebody to preoccupy her time so she doesn't have to spend it "getting over you" and how she will feel that she lived a lie these past years. Gee maybe your wife could even have a *faithful* marriage then. And maybe *the other guy* deserves the same!
Evidently you must not be IN love with your wife like you seem to believe you are!
Hello,
I have been married for close to 3 years now, we really dont have any issues within us at all. We are happy in all possible ways. We are emotionally attached, we are sexually happy. But yes because of my work nature i am unable to spend time with my wife as much as before. Also recently i have come across a women at work who has come really close to me; she knows me very well, knows that i am married and happy with my relation with my wife as well. My wife also knows her as a very good friend of mine. She has been telling that she loves me, and she loves me like crazy. We have even spend very intimate moments and made love couple of times as well. Now she is going to get married. I am getting emotionally involved cos i have also started to Love her. I love my wife as well, cos she is very good at heart and understands me well. I just want to understand how do i handle this situation, when the other lady in my life is going to get married but still promises to love me in the same way. What kind of a relation will that be? I am doing right but getting involved with her? If i get out of the relationship will it hurt her? It will be difficult for me to just get out if this cos i also love her. Please help me!!
You made a commitment to your wife (and vice versa), and your new work friend is preparing to make a lifetime commitment to another man. If your wife has managed to stick it out with you in spite of your behavior with this other woman (and, believe me, she probably at least senses that something is going on), then count your blessings, re-commit yourself to your wife, and leave this other woman alone! You've been lucky enough to find love once. Don't throw it all away to chase after some other woman who seems ready to commit to someone other than you.
What kind of a relation will that be? What kind of relationship is it N0W!
The difference will be she will be married T00 and so she will be cheating on a husband just like you are cheating on a wife.
What to do!??? Since you love her and she loves you. Get her bf and your wife together and ditch the two of them so you can be together with the 'other woman'. Then your wife has somebody to preoccupy her time so she doesn't have to spend it "getting over you" and how she will feel that she lived a lie these past years. Gee maybe your wife could even have a *faithful* marriage then. And maybe *the other guy* deserves the same!
Evidently you must not be IN love with your wife like you seem to believe you are!
I am ready to recommit myself, my wife also thinks there is nothing going on, my behaviour has not changed with her at all. We dont have any issues at all. I have tried to break up many a times with the other lady, but she is the one who doesnot want to leave me. She has told very clearly "I want you in my life..I need you .. i love you etc..." which is confusing me. I dont want to cheat my wife.She is a sweetheart, good in all sense.Please suggest?I really need an advice on this.One more thing is that this other lady is getting in to a relationship and prepared to cheat on her would be cos when we started having an affair; i was already married. She knew it very well that i would never end up my marriage.Yet another fact that she is not a virgin, which she claimed was an accident. This is again giving me doubts.Please advice?
You made a commitment to your wife (and vice versa), and your new work friend is preparing to make a lifetime commitment to another man. If your wife has managed to stick it out with you in spite of your behavior with this other woman (and, believe me, she probably at least senses that something is going on), then count your blessings, re-commit yourself to your wife, and leave this other woman alone! You've been lucky enough to find love once. Don't throw it all away to chase after some other woman who seems ready to commit to someone other than you.
I am ready to recommit myself, my wife also thinks there is nothing going on, my behaviour has not changed with her at all. We dont have any issues at all. I have tried to break up many a times with the other lady, but she is the one who doesnot want to leave me. She has told very clearly "I want you in my life..I need you .. i love you etc..." which is confusing me. I dont want to cheat my wife.She is a sweetheart, good in all sense.Please suggest?I really need an advice on this.One more thing is that this other lady is getting in to a relationship and prepared to cheat on her would be cos when we started having an affair; i was already married. She knew it very well that i would never end up my marriage.Yet another fact that she is not a virgin, which she claimed was an accident. This is again giving me doubts.Please advice?
hmmm....MAYBE you could think about it in this perspective.... YOU PLAY with fire YOU GET burned!!!
What IF---Wife finds out.....gf is now married......wife leaves your cheatin' heart......
gf and new hubbie work things out.....and YOU are left out in the cold with NEITHER!!!
Then there is the Integrity, morals, faithful, commitment type issues that just maybe you should prioritize as the right thing to do!?
I've seen a movie like this (Romulus, my father) watch it some time. Everything you've added in you question is EXACTLY the same as the movie i listed above. The lady who married the father left him and her son behind and married some other guy. They had a kid together but the guy committed suicide coz' she was having WAY to much sex with other guys. The guy she left was in love with another lady, but was still very much in love with his wife. He found out by a friend of his that the lady was marrying this other guy, and his wife also committed suicide. I suggest that you watch this movie and if the lady you've been seeing behind your wife's is already getting married, then why would you believe she loves you? She's getting married!! And you have a wife back at home trusting you with ALL her heart. What do you think might happen if she found out you were having an affair with another lady? Or put yourself in her shoes You'd be devastated to find that this good friend of yours has barged into your relationship and stolen he man you loved. If she does find out, do you think that she might be able to trust another guy again???
Why don't you come clean with your wife. It is not fair to her to keep lying. She has committed herself to you. You can not say the same thing. You are acting as if you are single with no attachments. Otherwise, you would not be having sex with two women.
Thank you very much for such an awesome advise. I will surely clear this issue off in a smooth way. Thank you all for showing me the right path. I now believe that there are still Good people who think good about others. Thanks ever so much. Cheers!
I would like to add that I have been the wife in this kind of situation. I found out that my husband of 22 years was trying to arrange a get together with another woman he met on line. She was showing him her body parts via web cam.
It has really killed the trust I had for all thoes years. It eats at me every day. It hurts when I think of the email he sent that I read. This will damage your relationship.
I will not leave my husband, I love him to much but I will never trust like I use to.
Linear Mode
