I'm at my wits end. I have been in a realationship with my husband for 11 years and he has 2 kids. Blended familys are hard. That is what I heard from everyone. I love kids so I thiught it would be no problem. Right? Wrong! My husband for the most part is a wonderful person he treats me very well and provides for me very well and shows me that I'm important except when his children are around. He tries to show me attention when they are here but it feels like fake attention. It feels like he is throwing me a bone. I feel that he plays games when they are here. Like say we get into a fight I don't like to fight in front of anyone so we go into our bedroom and in the middle of the aurgument he yells something like "you dont even like my kids anyway" Then he will apoligise later but mean while the kids have heard that and it is hard for someone to forget something like that. The fight we are having right now is about 2 months ago his oldest son wanted to bring his 15 year old girlfriend down for th weekend ( his son id 18)and my husband didn't ask my opinion about it at all and we got in a fight. So they came down and while they were hear they were very disrespectful. They had to be told 4 or 5 times to stop fondling each other in front of us then I went to go and get a coat out of the bedroom and there they were lights out and under the covers, had to tell them twice to stop that too. They had there clothes on but it was not o.k. with me and then my husband was resistant to go and stop it. Well his son called last week and asked if he could come down and so my husband said sure and I don't have a problem with that at all I love them very much. So in my mind he was coming down then 2 days ago I find out that he is bringing his girlfriend too. Again my husband never asked my opinion about any of this. When I found this out we had a very calm conversation about what happened last time and he said " you know your right the way they acted last time they were here was inapropriate and I am going to ask him not to bring her." So then we talked later and he repeated the conversation that he had with his son and I was releaved. Then yesterday I find out that he doesn't remember having that conversation with me that she wouldn't come down only the part that they need to be respectful. How can I remember a different conversation then him? I really feel he plays games around his kids and that is not fair to me or the kids because it puts a untrusting bug in my realationship with the kids and one with my husband. I know the boy is 18 and should be able to be an adult but I wouldn't do the things they were doing in front of my parents. I am worried about my realationship with my husband. I have been bitting my tongue for 11 yrs and I just cant anymore. Please help me I don't know what to do. I'm sorry this is so long I just wanted to tell the whole story so someone could have the whole picture. Thank you for your time.
dragnflyangell