How to get my marriage back? Me and my husband have been togerther for 17yrs.

Well he got the court papers,he was hot. He thought I was joking. Well my kids race cars now he's saying they can't race and he's going to sell their cars. My kids love to race they look forward to it all week. I told him I own half and he can't sell them. The only ones he is hurting is them. They don't even want to see him now cause they feel like he cares more about his girlfreinds kids then them. I don't know what to do.

What you have to do is be stronger than you have ever been, and stick to your plan.

Nobody said it would be easy, and you will have major doubts along the way, and no doubt he'll want to stop you. This situation was not caused by you; he is seeing that you have a backbone, and you are getting on with your life.

What worries me is that he was arrested after the last big argument, and he has a problem controlling his temper. I don't know what went on there, but you are vunerable when things finally sink in with him that you are serious, and you are moving on without him.

He's going to show his anger because he has lost control. Now he has nothing to lose because you've actually left, so be careful.

Now that you have a lawyer, I suggest that any and all information be relayed through him. Let your husband know that he is not to come around, or text, or contact you in any way, unless it is through the lawyer.

It is better for the kids, and you, that you do not answer his text messages, and his phone calls. Him being served papers pobably does not convince him- yet, that you are serious. They are only papers.

Stay strong and be careful.

I don't have a lawyer,I just went to the court house for custdy and child support. He came by today saying he made a big mistake and she was not worth all that has happened. I told him when he's ready to grow up and act like the man I fell in love with then maybe we can talk. Right now he's in shock,and I feel he needs to take a long look at his life.

It's good that you have taken moves for child support, good for you!

AND, I agree with you in keeping him at arm's length so he can fully realize what he has done. Let HIM offer solutions, and have him SHOW you what he is willing and capable of doing to try to get the marriage back on track.

You are in a position where you can really make decisions here that, if they pay off, he will have shown you by what he does, that he is seriously about his marriage and family.

Talk is cheap.

Oh course he is regreting what he did most likely because he knows he going have to pay child support and I am sure his mistress wasn't to please.

Handle everything through court if he can't act civil and bring up the race cars at your divorce hearing.

No matter what stay strong and determine.

Fawn I hope you get this message...go to the website narcissismcured.com there is a couple named kim and steve cooper who have been through this and can help...I believe in their program and am studying it now and it seems to be working! Do not leave yet...I know this is contrary to what everyone says but just try this and pray...this man you married is a human being ans is lost right now...you have to be strong now and take a stand against letting anything destroy your marriage...this will be the toughest thing you will ever have to go through but you will succeed if it is what you want...sometimes you will wonder why you want it and you may in the end move on, but you cannot do this now as you are still attached to him and it is not the time....check out that site and of course everyone will say leave him it is easy for them they don't have anything invested and have no love for him etc...let these people be your strength and give your ego a boost as it is surely shredded but always follow YOUR HEART and make your own decisions when your ready...right now you don't want to let go so you need to learn the techniques necessary to deal with this lost husband so he can be found...don't give your man to that woman! And don't forget to pray...this is your chance to have faith and get to know God...how bad do you want this? Are you ready to be a better person? Go for it...anything is possible and their are many woman who stay with their cheating men...hillary clinton, jackie o, who else, and many men who do the same...we are flesh and tempted all of us for flesh and ego gratification...if God can forgive him so can you and your kids will learn how couples stick together and succeed through obstacles...it won't be easy...life just isn't.

love youreself look deep inside of youreself and ask why am I letting someone else control my emotions and feelings in this way you re worth more believe me