I am really needing some advice right now. I have been married for a few years to a great man. I love him very much. I'm afraid I'm going to ruin it because for some reason, I can't stop thinking about my first love. I met him online, I am from California and he is from Germany. I flew to Germany to see him and spent a summer there when I was a teenager (yes my parents let me). It was the BEST summer of my life. I have never felt so much love for anyone... But for some reason I broke up with him... To this day I still can't figure why I would do such a stupid thing. I was a junior in high school getting ready to graduate early and I was going to go back to Germany to be with him afterwards. Anyway, I guess I have a lot of regret and keep thinking "what if?" and it's absolutely driving me crazy. I really broke his heart when I broke up with him. We talked a little bit afterwards but I guess the damage was done and I ruined it. Anyway, I am married to man I love very much. I don't want to sound like I am going to leave him for these old feelings - I just need advice on how to get rid of these old feelings because I don't think it's fair to him for me to think about my love for another man while I'm married to someone else. I know it would break my heart if he constantly thought about another women. Considering the circumstances, there really isn't anyone I can talk to about it... I'm just hoping someone will tell me that I will eventually get over Christian(my ex)

Thanks for reading my sob story,
M.L.

Marriage counseling, will really help

You shouldn't regret anything. It was choice you made. If you say you love your husband. Than just think of everything that made you fall in love with him. The past is the past. Don't dwell on it. Live for the present and for the future with the great man you married.

For some reason you broke up with him.
That's it.

Stop dreaming.
You are married to a man who loves you and you love him.
Don't sabotage your life.

You don't know what you've got till it's gone...

Thank you for the insight. I would absolutely never want to sabotage my marriage - our marriage is sacred. This was just something I had to get off my chest. And I love being able to talk about it on this website, I'm very glad I found it! Very honest people that I can talk to without the worry of someone at home knowing this.

There you go...
Don't sabotage it...

Read some of the questions on this board.
Count your blessings.

Don't even go there Mira559... enjoy your life.
Nothing is perfect.
Nothing.

And I gree.. it's great to vent with people you don't know, your "secret" is safe here and hopefully you can move on now.

:)

Mira, u know what I did, while being happily married, I caught up with this sleazy married man... and you won't believe it... it's not me at all. Sometimes takes me to suchy deep regrets that I start hating myself for it. But now, thankfully, that I recollected myself and practicalities ruled, I got those feelings rugged because I knew there are lot of things we want in life, but not necessary we get it. Some memories are just to be cherished and not ruin our existence to the point where it hampers our personal growth in the present. What you had with that man... was beautiful at that point in time... u felt the breeze and now what is your present? Your husband right? u're going to make the most of it with him... the memories to cherish later... so life moves on... and we live in the present... your present will take you to the future that wish to build... now it's up to you what you want to build... think...