Originally Posted by JG69
While this would apply in an ideal world, we don't live there yet.
Never mind that your husband has cheated on you, deceived you, and disrespected you in the highest regard; he is also keeping in contact with a woman who has disrespected you in a personal way.
She basically told you that your husband belongs to her, and there is not a thing you can do about it. Sorry, but this woman is CLEARLY a trouble-maker and she has absolutely no regard for the way you have been made to feel in YOUR own marriage.
That fact that he allows this speaks measures of where his priorities are. He obviously doesn't care about the way you feel either.
You are being trampled on by these 2 people. If they would have handled it differently instead of being so antagonistic about it, maybe it would have worked out for everyone. But as I see it, you are the odd-one-out.
I'm not going to tell you what you should do (leave him, force him to stop seeing her) because those are your decisions and yours alone. You will do what you feel comfortable doing as your own person.
But, honestly, if this man gave even a fig about you he would cut all contact with this woman immediately and he would actively look for other friends that he has not slept with.
Love = sacrifice without regret. And I don't see him sacrificing anything.