Blended family

You marrying him just 17 months ago, isn't a magic bullet that will make him a good father to your children. I presume that the first 7 years of your relationship, he had the same attitude toward your children? So, he's been in their lives for over 8 years, and has essentially had the same attitude?

To your children, he IS their father, but for some reason, chooses to dial out. It would be helpful to know how old your children are- maybe he's making excuses because what you are asking him to do, or help with, he doesn't know how to help, or is unsure of what he's doing?

He must know that he is responsible for them, as do you. Why do you think he's dialing out?

My kids are 15 year old boy a 16 year old girl and a 20 year old young man my 20 year old works and goes to school. He is saving his money to get his own place. He is never at home because of work and school. He pays rent but my husband does not want him there I can't put my son out he's not disrespectful we have no family. My
daughter stays in her room she is a honor roll student. My other son is very quiet stays in his room also. I have asked my husband to show my boys how a man should be there father is not in there life. I tells me it's my fault they don't have a father because I chose to have kids by them. I maybe married but I'm still a single mother.

What is your question?

JaykayTee is I don't know how to handle what Im going through. There is so much more I'm going through. I need help!

You cannot force someone to be a father. It's as simple as that.

How was he toward the children before you were married? It's difficult to believe that he was good with them and then everything suddenly changed.

No one can answer a question which isn't really a question - "So much more" tells me nothing.

There's a clue to what is going on when you say you love him but love them more. Love has no limit, so you are implying that you are ready to make a choice between them. You don't say who owns the home or whether he has kids. Does the 20 year old share the grocery bill? You don't say who supports the family. Is the help you ask for monetary? Teens are money sinks. You just aren't telling us enough to go on. Money is the #1 cause of dissension between spouses.

Before we got married we did not live together. When we moved in together that's when things changed. He has been married before he raised his ex-wife kids they call him there father. He has to kids with his ex-wife. I'm not trying to force him to be a father all I want is for him to treat them fair. Let me tell you some of the things he does. His kids are 11 and 13 now the rule in our house is no eating in the living room my kids don't if they do he gets mad BUT his kids can. If I'm at work he will go out and buy his kids dinner and not mine. He thinks just because his kids don't live there they should not clean up after there selves but my kids should. I buy his kids Christmas presents he don't buy my kids nothing. He got mad that my 20 year old son took me and his little brother to the movies! That's just some of the things he does. I'm at work right now my son just called me and asked can he turn the air on he woke up hot. I turned the air on before I left its 105 here in Atlanta today my husband turned it off before he left. That's what I mean about there is so much more and there is more.

@joypulv I don't ask him for money I take care of my kids I work everyday I have always took care of them. We both own the home, my son pays rent every month. I buy the food I buy everything for the house I pay the light bill and pay the cable bill the only thing he pays
us the mortgage. I pay everything because my kids are there plus I make sure they have what they need.

Why are you with this man - why don't you leave? HE controls the air conditioning?