| Premature child: Emotionally immature but cognitively challenging
My granddaughter is 2 years 4 months however she was born at 30 weeks gestation. She seems emotionally immature but "bright" with a vocabulary of over 500 words. She will play with older children but often takes a long time to "warm up" and do activities that other children just get in and do. She has to make her own sandwich, empty contents onto her own plate etc. and often cries if she isn't doing as she wants. Since about 15 months she has wanted 2 of everything and will break something (biscuit etc) in half if she can't have 2. It seems to be mixture of wanting her own way but also that she is planning what she wants to do and of course I am not on the same page all the time. She has great concentration skills and will complete a whole stickerbook in one sitting. She loves books and finds the tiniest of creatures even if it hidden in a tree or in a label without it being mentioned. She knows her colours and shapes, differentiates pink from purple, light from dark, small from big etc.
It seems she has advanced memory skills, and is matching and classifying objects. She can count to 10 using objects and knows the letters which start words like mum, dad, dog, cat, boat, dolly etc. as she puts the magnetic letters up and says them. She can read a few words which is only rote learning though. The other day I missed a turnoff to go home some 10kms away (she had been that way once 3 months ago) and she said "you go that way" and pointed. I didn't think I had heard her right but I had actually missed the turn by then on the motorway). She never forgets the sequence of activities once she has done them a couple of times. Like at dancing, which she will only watch and cries if I try to get her to join in (she has been twice), she turned to me and said "What's next" after the children had done 3 activities. Then she answered her own question with the correct dance to come and starting doing the actions. She seems to watch and absorb information and then uses it in the right context. She does not like new places and appears to go into sensory overload sometimes and cries/wants to go home and asks to go. Her mother is in the "gifted" range with an IQ of 148 but unlike her little girl, she was a very emotionally composed infant/child. Her father's family is similarly intelligent and unfortunately there is some Asergers in his family with a sister who is "genius" level. Some of his siblings social skills are questionable whereas we come from very social families. This little one does socially engage, gives good eye contact, has a sense of humour and plays tricks on us. She is just non-compliant to the usual activities and seems to "march to her own drum".
Is she really "bright" or is she likely to have Aspergers? Should we have any concerns or find out how to best provide her with a balanced preschool experience that allows her to develop emotional regulation. How can we help her emotional development so that she can enjoy her abilities and be more socialised with children her own age? Her adjusted age 2 year old Stanford Binet test showed above average skills (nothing "gifted) except for gross motor development, however, she was non-compliant for many of the activities, and stayed doing activities she found interesting.
Any advice will be appreciated.
 | 
Linear Mode
