Ill try to keep this a short as possible.

7 months ago I came home from work to a note from my wife. Her dad and her had concocted a plan for him to drive here and take her and our kids to their house out of state.

I called the police, nothing they could do. I called family services and was told "a custodial parent has the right to take the kids wherever. Get a lawyer"

The kids are finishing up school next week and I want to bring them back here, but Im getting alot of backlash from her. Stuff like "well Ill have to check their schedules" (shedules for kids under 8??) and "I dont know about that, we'll see."

Our basic marital problem is where we live. She hates it here and wants to live close to her parents (what a fantastic reason to break up a marriage )

Anyway, what rights do I have to go get my kids? She doesnt even work from crying out loud. I send her money for stuff she needs. Yet she wants to tell me where we should live, but thats a completely different story.

Neither of us has been to a lawyer as I assumed eventually things would be resolved.

pluckyflamingo

Well apparently there aren't fixing themselves. If you cared enough about your kids it shouldn't take you this long to fight for them. My parents went through the same thing and my father sounded exactly like you. If you love them at all you would get a lawyer and quit being such a wimp before you lose more valuable time with your chilren.

franksandbeans

Nice answer a-hole. Are you my wife?

Next please.

Tuscany

Get a Lawyer and find out what your rights are.
As father of those children you still have rights.

pluckyflamingo

I can see why she left you with that attitude, I was just giving advice because I have been there you jerk. Grow up!

franksandbeans

My only attitude is towards you and your "if you cared for you kids" comment jerk.

Of course I care for them. Its a complicated situation and your "quite being a wimp" answer is no solution.

pluckyflamingo

well if someone told you to get a lawyer right off the bat get a lawyer. It is as simple as that

jstrike

I'm not a lawyer so this is just my advice and thoughts....take it for what it's worth.

I've was very close to a divorce several years ago...fortunately we got some counseling, worked through our problems and are now both happier than ever. Counseling should be something to consider for both of you as well if you want to restore your marriage.

She has the right to take the kids anywhere as long as she is taking care of them. If you want to see your kids then drive out to see them. You might want to do this during the week while they are still in school so you know they'll be home. She cannot keep you from seeing your children no matter where she is. She can refuse to bring them to you but she can't refuse you access to them. If they are home and she refuses to let you see them don't argue/fight with her, just call the local police right there....This is NOT the best thing for the kids but it will tell her that you mean business about seeing your kids. The last thing you need in a situation like this is to get arrested for domestic violence....especially in another state.

If you don't want a divorce then it sounds like your way out of this may be to move closer to her parents. (Assuming you can find work there) My wife is very close to her mother and distance can be rough even though we only live an hour away from her.

If you want to get a divorce then hire an attorney and freeze your assets. Do not give her any money without getting a signed receipt from her. (My boss learned this one the hard way) You're kids are the most importing thing and you still need to take care of them. A signed receipt for anything that you give her will show that they are receiving money. I may be wrong (again, I'm not a lawyer) but I don't think you're under any financial obligation to her....just your kids. You have adequate food/clothing and shelter for her and your children where you are living....she's just choosing not to accept it.

I firmly believe that marriages should last a lifetime...sadly many don't. I sincerely hope that you two can work through your problems and fix whatever is wrong in your relationship. For the sake of both you and your children.

If I'm wrong about something I've said here someone please let me know.

Good Luck.

franksandbeans

Since you start uber-important topic like "potty training a ferrett" and "korn cds" and "comedy movies" Id rather take advice from someone else.

pluckyflamingo

Yeah franksandbeans I am 20 years old so what I was giving you advice not from a parents point of view I was giving it from the kids point of view.