I was never married to my 13 year old son's biological father. However I was married to someone else at the time. My ex-husbands name is on his birth certificate since the law says if you are married the husband is the legal father regardless of the actual biology. My ex did know that the child was not biologically his but has raised him as his own anyway.

The biological father has not been involved with our son, but wanted to be. He was not financially etc. stable at the time our son was born, and by the time he got his life together, my son was already established with my ex-husband. He thought was doing the right thing by staying away, and not forcing the issue or disrupting his life.

He has kept up with how he is doing, via phone, and e-mail through the years with me.

Recently, my son has been told the truth about hIS “real” dad. I told the bio-dad of this, and he is THRILLED. He has been seeing him, and wants to establish paternity and get visitation, and pay child support. All the stuff a “dad” does.

No-one wanted to take away anything away from my ex husband since he's been a decent father to him all these years.But my exhusband has to understand that he is not the biological father. He doesn't want to work with us at all and change the visitation schedule so we can all have some time with him. I don't blame him really, but no-one is trying to hurt him. My son wants to see his biological dad and his half brother and sister on his side.

When my ex and I divorced, child visitation and support was detailed out in the paperwork. He says that if we want to change that we have to go to court.

We are wondering if the bio-dad stands any chance to re-gain legal rights to his child since it's been 13 years since he was born, and he has had no formal contact with him during that time. We are going to get an attorney, but until then, we were just wondering if he stands a chance at all.

What state do you live in and what state was the divorce done in?

This will depend on state laws, but it is something of a long shot. Many states hold that when a child is born in a marriage, the husband is considered the father. A bio father might force a change if done within a reasonable time frame. But 13 years would not be considered reasonable.

As for child support, I would forget that at least on a formal basis. If the bio father wants to contribute towards your son's living, there is nothing to stop him from doing so. But it would not be done under a court order.

As for visitation, if the legal father (and your ex IS the legal father). Wants to block it, then it will have to go to court. The court will then rule on the best interests of the child. If your son expresses a strong desire to maintain a relationship with the bio father, then there is a decent chance the court will go along.

One other issue is who has custody? If you have legal custody, I don't see where your ex can stop you from letting your son spend time with his bio father and family. You could not take this time away from his visitation rights, though.

Illinois.We live in Chicago.
We have shared legal custody and he has very liberal visitation.He has visitation shedule from Tuesday 5 pm to Tuesday 7 pm,from Thursday 5pm to Thursday 7pm every week, from Saturday 10 am to Sunday 10 am every week,he has five days in winter vacation and one month in the summer vacation and also he has right for visitation on his birthday and the Father's day.

As long as you don't take away from his visitation your son should be able to see his bio father.