Just to clarify, Judy was not saying that you particularly are an alcoholic. She was making a generic statement that some parents blame the courts and claim bias or preferential treatment, rather than admitting that they are just not the best place for the child(ren) to be.

I'm happy to hear that. Too often, parents put children in the middle and it doesn't benefit anyone whatsoever. As hard as it may be, you need to be the bigger person in all of this and not speak ill of their mother.

Sounds great; thanks for keeping us updated. Odds are the kids will stay right where they are, as it would take something extremely serious to remove the children from their current situation and place them with someone who only has supervised visitation at this point.

Hi everyone,

Just need to vent, well were do I start. About 4 weeks ago DCFS received a call that my girlfriends 15 year old sister was being physicall abusive towards my 14 year old son. The way this phone call was generated is that the mother during her monitor visitation was questioning the children. One of the children indicated that both kids got grounded for arguing and pushing each other. Needless to say the mother added more to it. The good thing is that the investigation showed no abuse and case was closed.

Ever since she has had my 12 year old boy call his attorny for every little thing. If he feels is punishments are unfair. He is the one with the Behavior disorders. His condition has been getting worse.

To top it off I told the supervisor of DCFS that the 8 year old first communion was going to be at 9 am that I switched it from 11 to 9.
Seven days before the communion after I was told it was going to be at 9am. Mother and I went to court 3 days before the communion and she was trying to get permission to attend. I was against it do to her trying to run me over 3 month before. Needless to say the court approve her the visitation. The bad thing was that my attorney knew the time and so did the supervisor of DCFS. Only one has integrity and its not DCFS. But the mother of course is stating I did it intentionally. My past experience and my conduct has always shown I put the children first.

What upsets me is that my children were questioning me and they were devastated thinking that I was capable of doing malice. I had to sit all 3 and go through my behaviors and actions of the past with them. Needless to say after that they were OK. I assured them that if they ever felt I was out of line to go to someone and talk or bring it to my attention.

Trust me, I can relate with what you're going through - my husband and I have been accused by his exwife of everything in the book, barring sexual abuse - but as hard as this is, you need to stop discussing this with the children. They do not need to be involved with the court process. They can speak to their guardian ad litem, but they don't need to know what their mother is saying about you and they don't need to hear negative things about their mother, regardless of what she says about you.

Who is supervising the visitation with the mother? Can they speak with the GAL regarding the actual conversation that took place between the mother and the kids regarding the fighting that occurred with your child and your girlfriend's sister?

The GAL's job is to represent the best interests of the children. Your 12-year-old saying he doesn't like a punishment certainly isn't grounds to remove the children from your household - that's what all kids say at some point. The GAL has probably had hundreds of kids tell them that they thought their punishments were unfair; the bottom line is as long as you're not abusing or neglecting them, the GAL is actually going to think it's good that you're providing them with discipline and structure.

I am sorry that I gave the impression, I was discussing what was taking place in the court house. I actually never did tell them what took place. What I did tell them was to reflect back with my charcter and actions.

That I have always invited there mother and her side of the familly to all functions. On christmas they were supposed to be with me. I put my feeling to the side and made arragements for them to be with there aunt, uncles, cousins and there grandma. To bring joy to there lifes and take away some of the darkness they are going through.

It is hard not to say bad things and I am learning not too.

That portion of the guardian ad litem. Thank you for easying my fears.

I too have had massive problems with dcfs in socal. I agree with you and think that they should be held accountable for what they are doing to innocent families. If you have have any info about how to start the process let me know.

Actually they have immunity from lawsuits

http://www.atwoodcs.com/0516976_Immu...en_Federal.pdf
UNITED STATES COURT OF APPEALS
The district court eventually granted summary
Judgment to the defendants on the remainder of plaintiffs’
Claims, but those issues are not before us, as plaintiffs appeal
Only the dismissal of claims based on absolute immunity.
It follows that social workers have absolute immunity
When they make “discretionary, quasi-prosecutorial decisions
to institute court dependency proceedings to take custody
away from parents.” Id. At 898. But they are not entitled to
Absolute immunity from claims that they fabricated evidence
During an investigation or made false statements in a dependency
Petition affidavit that they signed under penalty of perjury,
Because such actions aren’t similar to discretionary
Decisions about whether to prosecute.

Do you think that the dcfs worker is qualified to make decisions on your child's future? Do you think that it violates the civil rights of a child to make decisions on their future based on accusations or hearsay? Do you think the state needs to hire more qulified individuals to make those types od decisions?