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    SVLMom's Avatar
    SVLMom Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Nov 19, 2009, 02:50 PM
    Parentage by estoppel or de facto
    I have a 16 year old daughter who my soon to be ex husband is all of a sudden stating is not his because he doesn't want to pay support.

    Ex came into our lives when she was 9 months old. Has taken over the fatherhood role since this time (she has never met her bio dad even though she knows he is out there SOMEWHERE). Ex has even gone as far as having her name changed to match his about 14 years ago and we started adoption proceedings which were never finished around 13 years ago.

    I was told in court today that I need to present case law on parentage by estoppel or de facto parentage if I want it applied to the support amount.

    I really need help! I am in CA and cannot afford an attorney (I am on workmans comp and have a very limited income). Any of your help is appreciated.
    cdad's Avatar
    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
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    #2

    Nov 19, 2009, 02:57 PM

    Are you currently collecting support from the bio dad ? Have you tried to collect support from him ? Did you ever go to court for custody with the bio dad ?
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    #3

    Nov 19, 2009, 02:59 PM

    I have had an order for CS against bio dad since day one - the problem is that nobody knows where he is. The court took away all rights to bio dad except stated that he still had to pay - I have never seen a dime.
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    #4

    Nov 19, 2009, 03:02 PM

    Without a lawyer to help you with this your going to have a tough time proving the estoppel parentage. How is it that they want to grant you a second child support order for only 1 child. That doesn't make sense. If you were in Canada I could understand.
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    #5

    Nov 19, 2009, 03:16 PM

    I have never been able to collect on the first so if anything I could terminate the first and move forward to get the only father she has known to support her... I guess that I may be reaching for this one - but all of a sudden he wants to bail out on someone she has raised and called his own for 15 years doesn't make sense to me. He should have to support her legally based on the case laws and appeals that I have been reading. I just figured I would ask for help since I am lost.

    Thank you
    cdad's Avatar
    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
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    #6

    Nov 19, 2009, 03:26 PM

    Try looking here

    http://rds.yahoo.com/_ylt=A0oGkjmhxA...egalUpv3i1.pdf



    And here

    ASSOCIATION OF CERTIFIED FAMILY LAW SPECIALISTS OPENING BRIEF IN SUPPORT OF APPELLANT/PETITIONER JAYCEE B.
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    #7

    Nov 19, 2009, 03:29 PM
    Here is another.

    http://rds.yahoo.com/_ylt=A0oGkjmhxA...pubs/bg203.pdf
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    #8

    Nov 19, 2009, 03:33 PM
    The last one is instructions for a judge to follow to establish a guideline for the court system to help answer the question parentage by estoppel. In the California court system.
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    #9

    Nov 19, 2009, 03:38 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by califdadof3 View Post
    The last one is instructions for a judge to follow to establish a guideline for the court system to help answer the question parentage by estoppel. In the California court system.
    I can't thank you enough!!
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    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
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    #10

    Nov 19, 2009, 03:48 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by SVLMom View Post
    I can't thank you enough!!!
    Your welcome. Come back and let us know what happened. Also feel free to post anytime you have a question. Welcome to AMHD ( Ask Me Help Desk )
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    #11

    Nov 19, 2009, 03:55 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by califdadof3 View Post
    Your welcome. Come back and let us know what happened. Also feel free to post anytime you have a question. Welcome to AMHD ( Ask Me Help Desk )
    I will - it will be a few months until the hearing. Can I bother you for one more ?

    He walked away from our house saying that I can have it. The problem is that I am upside down 60K. Is there a way the court can have him split the difference with me? He says that he won't pay alimony (we were married for 12 years) and that I have all the credit card bills and auto payments. What can I do?
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    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
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    #12

    Nov 19, 2009, 04:05 PM

    He can say all he wants. California is a community property state and that even goes for the negative side of credit. As far as alimony goes that's up to the judge not him and for that length of time it may be awarded for lifetime. You wint know unless you ask for it. But the house and credit cards etc can and will be split. The problem is that you still may not recover and bankruptcy may be your only option later on. Many divorces end that way.

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