Michigan. I am a 40yo wife & mother of 6. I thought the man that raised me was my father, but I knew someone was keeping a secret. Turns out my father had a wife and I find out at 12. At this time, I begin to doubt that my brother and I share the same parents. I ask my mom if my daddy is my biological father and she says yes and that I'm attacking her integrity and that she could have aborted me and she goes on and on. At 18, my dad denied he's my dad to his wife to keep from having to fight her he says. But, my mom has always behaved as if she didn't want me & my dad to be too close. She has even said that if my dad does things for me or his grandkids, then that takes money out of her pocket! She has never supported herself and was on welfare when we were growing up and my dad supported us and her. For almost 26yrs she swore up & down that he was my dad. After my dad agreed to take a DNA test and 1 month before I remarried, mom tells me that she knows the man that raised me isn't my biological father and that he just happens to share my son's name. She is trying to convince my dad not to take the test because it is a waste of time cause she's 1000% sure that he isn't my dad. She won't look for him because she doesn't see what good it would do her! Every week she calls and harasses me about not speaking to her even though she says she deceived me and betrayed me and lied to me because she wanted to and because she could. My question is, can I sue her to find out the truth and get her to pay for a paternity test? And is there another way to punish her for deceiving me and my dad all my life? My dad says he doesn't believe I'm not his, but he is in the first stage of Alzheimers.

You can't, being a bad mother and hiding your real fathers ID is not illegal, and there is no real money related injury to sue for.

And your dad is the man who raised you, plain and simple, don't matter who the sperm donor was.

So if you want a DNA test do it, or just decide that no matter who your mom sleep with, your dad is the man who was there for you and with you as a child.

Im not a laywer and so I'm not sure as to what's legal or not, but to me this is more about the integrity of a mothers relationship with her daughter. If that is who your mother is, then she is an awful, awful person. You know, its one thing to make a mistake, but another to to show no remorse and use the situation as a weapon/power trip against you; holding it over your head like she know she's got something on you. Ugh. Sick people.
People want to know where they come from, and part of being a loving, responsible, child-honorning parent is ensure that your kids know who they are and where they come from. Anyone that would keep that information from someone is a control freak and spiritually messed up.
A mother who would keep that from a child is not a mother at all. That behavior doesn't fit the definition of a loving mother at all.
Just know that you are loved, and your paternal ancestors are keeping watch over you as your guardian angels with much love and protection. Trust that they know who you are, and are overjoyed to have that spiritual connection with you.
As for your lying mother, she is a weido and Im glad I won't be around when her karma comes back to bite her in the .