My ex husband and I have been divorced almost 4 years now and he hired an attorney to handle our divorce since I couldnt afford one. We had three children in this marriage and we both agreed to joint physical and 50-50 shared custody of the children. We both have worked together for the last few years and both been satisfied with the situation. He recently got remarried and now the kids have a new stepmom. In the meanwhile, I had to move in with my mother because my income is so low. I then met my boyfriend and him and I recently got a small duplex. I am now unhappy with the situatuon because I cant really afford to keep a roof over my kids head. I only can do it because of my boyfriend. I still am asked from my ex to pay half of everything...school, camp, sports and so on. I pay it and then I struggle bad to make my car payment and rent. I am entertaining the idea of modifying our no support order to some support. The kids new stepmom told me I cant call after 9 to talk to my kids. I feel she is trying to replace me and I cant even afford anything for my kids. If my boyfriend left, I would lose my house and car. The kids are with me Tuesday and Wednesday nights and when its my weekend, I have them Friday night, Saturday night and Sunday night. Do I have a chance to get some support?

George_1950

Welcome to AMHD. To answer your question, probably not. In a way, you did major harm to yourself when you didn't take the initiative and hire your own lawyer. It's not just 'cheaper' using your husband's lawyer; it was his job to screw you, and you let it happen. Get away from the car payment situation as fast as possible; and, get to a trade school and update your job capabilities to enhance your income. Do not look to your exhusband for financial security; do it yourself.

Amandalyn

I am not looking for financial security. I am looking for a small amount of support.

George_1950

Ordinarily, you must show a 'change in circumstances' in order to be successful with a modification of child support. I'm not certain you can carry the burden of proof with the circumstances you have shared thus far, but you can always try. One thing I have learned several times is that children don't get cheaper as they get older. Your financial independence is crucial to your feelings of happiness and contentment, so keep your eyes open for better opportunities.

Amandalyn

What kind of change in circumstance? You are right..I screwed myself and now I want to unscrew myself before anymore time goes by. He got remarried and she is raising my kids while he works and I work. Isnt that a "change in circumstance"?

George_1950

"Change in circumstances" ordinarily means change in economic circumstances as a result of change in job, health, etc. What state are you in? Also, what does your custody agreement say about modification of child support, if anything?

ScottGem

You need to consult with an attorney. A change in circumstances would be a big increase in your ex's income or a big decrease in yours. Or a change in the custody arrangement.

I don't see any of those. As noted, you screwed yourself by goign into the divorce without your own representation. The only way you will get out of the pickle you got yourself into is by consulting with your own attorney.

Amandalyn

I dont believe it says anything. I did read online somewhere that a spouse remarrying is a change of circumstance. I have an attorney I am seeing Thursday who seems to think I can get it done. I have to pay 800.00. Also, my ex just told me he got a promotion and a pay raise

I am seeing an attorney Thursday. I have to pay a large amount of money to him. Hopefully that will get it done!


I am in Iowa

ScottGem

yes a remarriage is a change in circumstances, but not necessarily in your favor.

But talk to the attorney, they will know better whether you can get it done.

joeyhd1966

I also have 50/50 with my two daughters...does he pay you any support right now? If you put your monthly salaries together, what % does your ex make up? My situation is that I make roughly 66% of our combined income. I pay $450 per month in child support.

Hope this helps...