My son has always been in my custody. His father and I never married. I let my son stay with his dad this past school year because I moved counties. Now the dad won't let him come back and live with me. I happen to have him this weekend, and he said if I don't bring him back there will be trouble. The man doesn't work, lives with his g/f grandmother and owes back child support on 2 other kids..

Should I keep him with me and try to get legal custody papers?

Is the father listed on the birth certificate? Was there ever any custody hearings?

If the father is not on the because then he has no legal standing. Especially if no custody hearing was held. If he is on the because then he has defacto joint custody.

Your next step depends on the answer to my two questions, so lets us know and we'll advise further. It would also help to know how old the child is.

My child is 8 years old. The father is on birth certificate and never custody hearings. My child has always been in my custody, I have provided insurance.. eveything..

Ok, then, as soon as you get back the child I would file a petition for full custody. Consult with an attorney about how to do this. Most likely he will fight it, but given the circumstances, I doubt if he will win, but he will, in all likelihood, get visitation. I would also apply for child support at the same time.

Absent a support agreement, he had no right to keep your son or to dictate to you that you needed to return him.

But since he is the legal father, then he does have rights with respect to your son.

OK, sounds good.. my other question is I do happen to have my son with me now.. "for the weekend" and the father told me that if I do not bring him back there will be trouble.. do I ignore him and keep my son with me and not bring him back?

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Originally Posted by khousley

ok, sounds good..my other question is I do happen to have my son with me now.."for the weekend" and the father told me that if i do not bring him back there will be trouble..do I ignore him and keep my son with me and not bring him back?

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If there is no custody order either one of you can keep the child until there is a custody/visitation order - you should file NOW.

I realize the father doesn't work and whatever other problems you say he say - but all that aside, you allowed the father to have custody for the school year so that is pretty much not an argument at this time unless you want your parenting decisions to be called into question.

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Originally Posted by khousley

my son has always been in my custody. his father and i never married. I let my son stay with his dad this past school year because i moved counties. Now the dad wont let him come back and live with me. I happen to have him this weekend, and he said if i dont bring him back there will be trouble. the man doesnt work, lives with his g/f grandmother and owes back child support on 2 other kids..

Should I keep him with me and try to get legal custody papers?

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If there is no legal document to state who is the custodial parent, there is no LEGAL issue with you not bringing him back. I would strongly urge you to get a custody situation figured out soon.

Ps-totally not a lawyer here, just a divorced mom with LOTS of experience!

OK, thanks you guys.. now.. I do not have a lawyer.. is there a way to do this.. (file for custody papers) with out a lawyer?

I would not recommend it. You need to move fast before he does. And he may have an attorney to fight you which will put you at a disadvantage. So you need to move and move fast. You don't have the time to research what forms you have to complete and what motions you have to file.

OK I am doing that now.. thank you soooooooo much

Good luck and keep us posted!