bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE

You know what you should do? Be the parent!

I'm sorry if that came off harsh to you but she isn't 18 yet. Until then she must abide by your rules. You need to make her realize that.

If the father of the child has no job, I suggest he get one because he'll if he doesn't the courts will come after him.

Gernald

I know you don't want to get her in to trouble...but it's called tough love. Even if you know where she is, if she won't come home since she's under 18 she is a runaway. If she's having a baby and trying to get rid of you at 15 imagine what sort of trouble she's going to get herself in in the real world. Plus her record will not count twords anything because she is below 18..after 18 she can do what she wants and be punished with a record however the judge chooses. Just a suggestion.

Or maybe try calling her and asking her to come over just to visit and to leave her kid with the 'father' (he's not doing anything anyway). Sit down pop some pop corn or make dinner or something and have a good long chat. Try to get her views on the situation and then offer up a censored version of your opinion. If you don't like that she's not at home with you ask her to move back in, maybe even (if your okay with it) suggest that the father of the child move in too...on the condition that he gets a job and contributes maybe $100 or something every two weeks for food for everyone (primarily his child). Maybe even offer free room and board to him as long as he is at school and making good grades or taking the GED at the next available testing date (I don't know how old he is so I'm assuming he's still in High school).

Supporting your child is a good thing..but part of that support system is that you guide your child in the right direction, before 18 she's your responsibility so love her all you want, but do what beautiful bernette says and be the parent.

Fr_Chuck

Well personally I agree with beautifulbrunette, it is time to be a parent and set some rules, if you said she can't move, she can't,

you_know

Well from a childs point of you(which I am)..... I want to always try things on my own. I want to make decisions for myself and I want to make my life good by myself. I dont want to feel like I let people make my life good. I want to do it all on my own. You should let your daughter find out that she CANT do it on her own, and when she finds that out she will turn to you. There is were you need to be the parent and stand up and take care of her. Teach her responsibilty. Then make her get a job and her little boyfreind to. Soon they will be able to support there selves and mabye work hard for their future.

I am sorry if any of this offended you, you seem very nice and caring.

greeneyedbaby

I agree with you_know. I have a friend who has a 3 month old and she's 17. She moved out of her mom's house and was fine until the baby came. She then moved in with a family freind who needs a morning and evening nurse on account that he's paralyized. She still had her freedom but her mom was close to help. However the baby needs dipers and she has a cell phone and likes to go out all which needs money. So she just recently moved back in with her mom because she wasnt able to make it on her own. Be there and support her and let her know that your there when she needs you. You can still be a parent and not let her walk all over you but if and/or when she finds out that doing it on her own isnt possible she will come to you but thats only if you stay open with her if you make her think that you believe that shes going to fail at it she'll do everything in her power to prove you wrong which means she won't come to you when she needs help

you_know

Thanks green-eyed baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Gernald

I kind of have to agree with what you_know said too...there are so many ways to deal with this!

She probably will come back, she needs you even if she thinks she dosen't. This is a good route as long as she is an okay girl (besides getting 'knocked up' that is) and has a good head on her shoulders try keeping track of her and make sure she's not doing anything else stupid.

JudyKayTee

[quote=CRT36][b][f]my Daughter Is 15 And Just Recently Had A Baby. I Have Been Supportive And Pretty Much Put Everything On Hold For Her And The Baby. She Finally Told The Boy About The Baby And They've Been Talking Lately About Living Together. I Told Her That She Is 15 And Can't Move Out. So He Came To Stay With Us. This Weekend She Informs Me That They've Moved In With Some Friends And That She Wasen't Coming Home. I Don't Know What To Do. I Know Where She Is So She's Not A Runaway And She's Not Missing. But I Don't Want Her To Get Into Some Kind Of Trouble And Then I'm Responsible. I Feel Like If She Try's It On Her Own She'll Know That You Can't Make It On Love Alone. He Has No Job The Only Thing She Has Is Her Wic Vouchers. I Just Don't Know What To Do!!! Please Someone Tell Me Some Sound Advice.



This is a legal board, not a relationship board, and so -

You are LEGALLY RESPONSIBLE for her and the baby - do you want that responsibility when she is not under your roof?

She has enough problems now, 15 with a baby? How old is the boyfriend? Out there on her own, playing house, no rules, she could REALLY get herself jammed up and destroy the rest of her life. That baby deserves better than it's probably getting.

So I would go to Court and bring her home - or if that is not possible, then I'd emancipate her and get myself out from under legal responsibility. You are the parent; she is the child. The words, "Not on my watch, not under my roof" come into my mind.

Then I'd sit her down and discuss birth control - a conversation which you might have already had which she apparently didn't hear the first (or second) time around. People out there aren't just getting pregnant - they are dying of AIDS. It's no longer a question of pregnancy, it's a question of health and life.

JudyKayTee

This is a legal board, not a relationship board, and the mother has legal responsibility here. You did read that the daughter is 15. What kind of job do you think she is going to get to support this child? She needs to be back in school.