My boyfriend found out he had a child last summer. The child was already six months old when he was told it was his. My boyfriend had a one night stand with this woman. He didn't and still doesn't even know her. One day she just saw him driving and called out to him, raising the child into the air and said it was his. Now she claims that DHS is going to take away her welfare benefits and gave all information she has on my boyfriend. They want to do DNA testing and collect child support. He doesn't want to have anything to do with this child. If he signs his rights over, will he still have to pay child support? It just doesn't seem fair that this women made the decision on her own to keep this child knowing that she may never see his father again, and is now trying to nail him with child support. She is on complete welfare and has no idea what it is like to work hard for your money. What are my boyfriends rights in all of this?

mr.yet

Yes, still accountable for the support of the child. DNA testing is a good idea, may not be his.

ScottGem

If you check the many threads on this subject you would have already had your answer. One can relinquish ther parental rights, but not their responsibility. He will have to undergo a DNA test and, if the child is his, he will have to pay.

However, I would not assume the test will come back positive. If the woman is as you describe her she may be guessing as to parentage.

As for the fairness of it all, was it fair for your boy friend to have unprotected sex (I'm assuming that) with this woman as a one night stand? Is it fair for my taxes to have to go to support a child that your boyfriend isn't willing to? Sorry, but I have almost no sympathy for your bf who couldn't keep it in is pants.

LadyB

Yes, unless the relinquishment is to clear the way for an adoption, in which someone else accepts the rights and responsibilities, he has to pay child support.

If proven to be the father via DNA tests he has the right to a relationship with the child, with joint custody and visitation, or he has the right to try for primary physical custody and raise the child himself. Why would he want his kid raised with such a woman? One night stand or not, this is his progeny and he has to take the responsibility, so why not view it as an opportunity to be a great dad and raise a healthy, happy kid instead of looking at it as some kind of tragedy?

macksmom

They cannot start collecting child support until he is proven to be the father. Once the DNA test is complete (which he will have to do because it will be court ordered) that will give you your answer....if he's the father or not.

It's not as easy as you think....he can't just give up rights. If thats his child its his responsibility to support it. The only way he would be able to sign over his parental rights is if the mother agrees, and there is someone willing to adopt the child in his place. Otherwise, he will be responsible for supporting this child, regardless if wants to or not.

GV70

Scott, I like your last sentence

GV70

If he is proved to be the father he has rights /and obligations/ to pay child support next 18-22 years.
If he pays monthly he will take advantage of his right more than 200 times

Fr_Chuck

Yes, as you have already noted, don't matter if a one night stand, or a 30 year relationship. Does not matter if he wanted the child or not.

But yes if the mother is getting welfare, that state will hunt him down and get every penny due under law.

He can give up rights ( which means he can never see the child, never know his child) but he will still have to pay. He should want to know his child and ask for visits and the such.

ooJenniferoo

My brothers first child.....he decided after 2 years that he didnt want anything to do with him so he gave up all rights and gave full custody to the kids grandparents (the parents of the mother) and he hasnt had to pay ANYTHING since then. I'm not sure if they have actually adopted his son or not, i just know that neither my brother or the kids mom have to pay anything or have anything to do with the child.

ScottGem

What has probably happened here is that the parents haven't asked for support. NOT that your brother or the mother were relieved of paying anything. The laws in almost all jurisdictions separate parental rights from parental responsibilities.

Its really not helpful to relate a single experience that you apparently don't know all the facts about as advice to someone. The circumstances of your brother's case may not fit the OP's circumstances.