Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help!
  Advanced
Register  |  Log in  
   Ask    
 Answer  
  Help  

Ask QuestionsprogressAnswer QuestionsprogressBuild ReputationprogressBecome an Expert
 
Free Answers in 3 Easy Steps

Register Now
3 Steps

At Ask Me Help Desk you can ask questions in any topic and have them answered for free by our experts. To ask questions or participate in answering them you must register for a free account. By registering you will be able to:
  • Get free answers from experts in any of our 300+ topics.
  • Accept money for answers that you provide.
  • Communicate privately with other members (PM).
  • See fewer ads.

Home > Law > Family Law   »   dad wont give daughter her money because bf lives w gf and mom

 
Question Tools Search this Question Display Modes
Question
 
 
Old May 16, 2008, 11:54 AM
fc3smatt
New Member
fc3smatt is offline
 
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 3
fc3smatt See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.
dad wont give daughter her money because bf lives w gf and mom

ok im 22 my gf is 17 we have been together for a yr and 2 months were both very happy life is great ect. she was tired of school so she got her ged and now works full time.
we both live with her mother.
my gf was involved in an auto accident when she was 10 and recieved 36k in the case. that money is in a charles swabb account and cant be touched until shes 18 or 21 im not to sure bout which age. well like i said shes working full time and needs a car to get to work everyday. we can take her either in my car or her moms car but with gas prices these days its getting near impossible. her father is the only person who is allowed to withdraw from that account right now. my gf called the person she needs to talk to about getting about 9,350 for a car and they said thats perfectly acceptable. now heres where the problem rises, her father wont take the money out because i live with her and her mother. now we dont need another person in this world to not be a contributing member to society theres all ready way to many of those ppl, and im sure most of u know how difficult it is to not have a car. is there anything she can do to get her money? she jus needs it for a car, she makes great money but she wants to buy it out right so she doesnt have to worry bout payment. please leave me some advice so i can forward it to her

Reply With Quote
 
     

Answers
 
 
Old May 17, 2008, 03:08 AM   #11  
talaniman
Relationship Expert
talaniman is offline
 
talaniman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Space Is The Place
Posts: 15,851
talaniman See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.talaniman See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.talaniman See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.talaniman See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.talaniman See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.talaniman See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.talaniman See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.talaniman See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.talaniman See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.talaniman See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.talaniman See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.
As a dad, hell no, not a dime as I think allowing a b/f to stay with a daughter who lives with her mother is out of bounds, and is a red flag to me. Strange how distant dad has control, and mom doesn't. That in itself is telling. Me, I wait, and make sure she has a buck when she reaches that age. Between 3 adults they can't figure out how to get one back and forth to work? Especially since she works, and has options? Naw, she can wait, and then do whatever she wants with her money at the right time.
  Reply With Quote
 
     
 
 
Old May 17, 2008, 05:04 AM   #12  
JudyKayTee
Expert
JudyKayTee is offline
 
JudyKayTee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: NY State
Posts: 7,006
JudyKayTee See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.JudyKayTee See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.JudyKayTee See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.JudyKayTee See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.
Quote:
Originally Posted by fc3smatt
so everyone thinks its ok that her dad wont give her the money for the car because her bf lives there? her dad would be more than happy to buy her a car w his own money if she were to move in w the father


You don't know that.

She has two choices: (1) If she needs the car then she should move back in with the father; (2) If she needs to live with the boyfriend then she should live where she is without the car.

The Court sets distribution ages for this very reason - she should be happy it's 18 (or 21) in her case (I don't think you were certain) and not 35, which I see a lot.

As the boyfriend don't you want her to go back to school and get an education and maybe that's a better use for the money when she turns 18?

You should all be grateful that he isn't attempting to haul his daughter back to his house and having your mother arrested for custodial interference. She's 17 and has been "with you" for something like 18 months? Hmm.
  Reply With Quote
 
     
 
 
Old May 17, 2008, 07:12 AM   #13  
stinawords
Senior Member
stinawords is online now
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Indiana
Posts: 633
stinawords See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.
In my area I have seen things like this with an age of 25 more than either 18 or 21. And again I too think her father is going the right thing. In no way do I think he is being "unfair" though I did have to grin at the argument about it being unfair. This is exactly why responsible adults are put on accounts like this. I also think it speaks volumes for her father and what a good job he is doing, not getting pressured into making a decision and supporting something he dosen't believe in or dosen't see as being constructive to his daughter. So yes, kudos to her father!
  Reply With Quote
 
     
 
 
Old May 17, 2008, 07:19 AM   #14  
Fr_Chuck
Christianity Expert
Fr_Chuck is offline
 
Fr_Chuck's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Atlanta GA
Posts: 25,201
Fr_Chuck has disabled reputation
Guess lucky it is not in GA, you would be in jail for being with her.
18 is the age of consent. But why if you are "living" together are you living wiht her and her mother, I would agree it sounds like a bad situation and I am not sure I would do this either. You and her should both be working and paying your own bills.
  Reply With Quote
 
     
 
 
Old May 17, 2008, 04:10 PM   #15  
twinkiedooter
Ultra Member
twinkiedooter is offline
 
twinkiedooter's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Smalltown Ohio
Posts: 3,926
twinkiedooter See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.twinkiedooter See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.twinkiedooter See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.
Mom is letting her underage daughter have a guy living with them? Dad seems to have a level head in not wanting the money squandered. I don't think he's upset about anyone living with the gf or her mom (but I personally think he does not like this scenerio as it was mentioned that he would buy her a car if she lived with him). I think that someone should help the daughter get a car (such as co-signing a loan) or else just ferry her back and forth to work. Gas is not that expensive when you consider the cost of a car instead. You can buy a lot of gas in lieu of a new car. If she "makes good money", then what's the beef about paying for the gasoline? Don't quite understand the reasoning here. Until she can legally spend the money any way she wishes, she's going to have to abide by what her dad says now.
  Reply With Quote
 
     
 
 
Old May 17, 2008, 04:26 PM   #16  
froggy7
Ultra Member
froggy7 is offline
 
froggy7's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,631
froggy7 See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.froggy7 See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.froggy7 See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.
And I have to ask... why 9K for the car? If I recall correctly, my first car cost around 2K, my second one around 4K, and my third one was the first where I spent over 10K. Yes, the first ones were older cars (about 6 years old), with some fair miles on them, but they were fine for getting me to and from work and school. Set your sights lower, and the daughter may be able to pay for the car out of her current earnings.

Just be sure to have an independent mechanic look at the car before you buy it, especially if it doesn't have a warranty!
  Reply With Quote
 
     
 
 
Old May 17, 2008, 04:41 PM   #17  
twinkiedooter
Ultra Member
twinkiedooter is offline
 
twinkiedooter's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Smalltown Ohio
Posts: 3,926
twinkiedooter See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.twinkiedooter See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.twinkiedooter See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.
I've gotten some dandy cars way under $1,000 that got me from point A to point B. I agree with Froggy - why so expensive a car? Is it because you want the car to drive?........... have seen this before.
  Reply With Quote
 
     
 
 
Old May 17, 2008, 07:16 PM   #18  
Handyman2007
Full Member
Handyman2007 is offline
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 240
Handyman2007 See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.
Why not find a car for a little less money??? Like several thousands less. 9300 is a lot of money. If she only needs a car for getting to work, it doesn't have to be a Rolls Royce!!!!!I think if you found a car for around $1500 or so, he may be a little easier on you guys. His point( from what I can gather from this is) you are living there with them- why can;t you come up with some mopney for a car?? That is what he is thinking. Even better......find a car for a lot less money and offer to pay for half of it if he ponies up the other half. There are ways to negotiate this, Try to be a man on this one and step up to the plate and be businesslike....just becuase ther is money in trust for this girl doesn't mean she is enitiled to it right now and that is his decision.
  Reply With Quote
 
     
 
 
Old May 18, 2008, 06:58 AM   #19  
califdadof3
Senior Member
califdadof3 is offline
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 673
califdadof3 See this member's comment history on his/her Profile page.
Quote:
Originally Posted by fc3smatt
so everyone thinks its ok that her dad wont give her the money for the car because her bf lives there? her dad would be more than happy to buy her a car w his own money if she were to move in w the father

Ok .. you have to remember you came to a legal board not a moral support anything you want board. As far as legal goes she isnt entitled to the money anyway. You said yourself there were restrictions on it. If life is so unfair at the moment consider this. How responsible can you be if you cant live independently ? I know you and your GF are starting out in life and thats always tougher but really if your so responsible you shouldnt be living under someone elses roof in the first place. As far as the car goes for a nice car with reasonable miles to get to work and back nothing more then 3-4 thousand is really needed and that car should last for years. Most of us that come on this board would love to have enough money to get whatever we want but as responsible adults we realize we have budgets and we stick to them ( sometimes sacrificing for anothers needs ) just to meet the budget. So bottom line is if you look at everything from the perspective of the law .. no she doesnt get a car or money from dad. Maybe its time to look in the mirror and decide its going to be a new day and rather then just play a grown up be one.

Comments on this post
talaniman agrees: Playing grown up, and being grown up, aretwo different things. Wise post.
  Reply With Quote
 
     


Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

 
Similar Sponsors

Similar Questions
Question Asker Topic Answers Last Post
How much money to give silver lady Weddings 1 Apr 15, 2008 02:01 PM
Claiming a grandchild that lives with you or does father that lives elsewhere? klpasker Taxes 6 Jan 5, 2008 06:31 AM
Give Her The Money, Or Is There A Law In California? KBeason Family Law 6 Nov 14, 2007 06:57 PM
How do we give our daughter our last name now that we're married? SarahPetersen Children 1 Nov 5, 2007 05:11 PM
Want To Give My Daughter My Married Name! fallinbutterfly Children 8 Jul 13, 2007 06:35 AM




Copyright ©2003 - 2007, Ask Me Help Desk.
All times are GMT -8. The time now is 07:38 PM.

Content Relevant URLs by vBSEO 3.0.0 RC6 © 2006, Crawlability, Inc.