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Custody and Child Support
Asked Oct 25, 2011, 10:21 AM
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33 Answers I have some questions regarding custody and child support. My ex-fiance (never married) and I broke up after he got arrested for domestic violence. He did not get convicted of this but I did get a restraining order against him, protecting myself and our son. He assaulted me while I was holding our child putting both myself and our child in danger. I have since dropped the restraining order but we are still figuring out what to do about custody. He has refused to sit down with me and make a parenting plan. He just tells me that he wants visitation of our son whenever he is not working, which I do not think is fair since he only works 2 to 3 days per week. That would not allow me any time with him, since the days he wouldn't have him, I would be at work. Right now I am allowing him to see him (with me present) pretty much anytime he wants. I am not a big fan of this since I am having to cancel plans to accommodate what he wants. As of right now he does not have any rights to see our son, because he hasn't gone to court to establish parental rights. He is now telling me that he doesn't want us to go to court at all to get custody sorted out. I would assume that he doesn't want to do this because he now realizes that once sorted out he will have to start paying child support. I want to have a formal parenting plan and also have formal residential custody (which he doesn't want me to get, because of the child support thing), but I do not want to deal with arguing with him in order to get this. What should I do? Should I go ahead and take him to court or will this just make things get messy? A few background details: He does not have a place to live right now (he is staying with a friend who is kicking him out at the end of the month, and his credit score is too low to rent an apartment), he is on probation with his job for stealing and the case is under investigation so he still may be fired, We live in Kansas. |
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| Marijuana is not illegal. I was not trying to be sexist, I have a little boy and I know that the maturity of a 9 year old little boy is not enough to care for a one month old baby. I also did not consent to custody and visitation. I was told it was something that had to be done. Also I did not consent to him taking the child out of state or farther unless it was within 50 miles. That is written in our custody agreement. I was just told this yesterday that he was taking our son with him to California. If you read in my past threads, he has threatened to kidnap him before which has led to him being arrested before, which is why the clause is in our agreement about him not leaving the state. I just need some legal advice on what to do from here. And Judy I had never been to one of these parties before I got pregnant. He seemed very responsible, but looks can be VERY deceiving. I did not know entirely what I was getting myself into. And how exactly do I go about reporting these activities to the authorities? Since I won't be in the same state I don't really know how to go about doing this. I really do appreciate what everyone is saying. As a parent though it is my duty to make sure that I do everything I can to protect my son and take care of him, which is something that I know that his father will not do. Maybe legally I don't have a right to protect my son, but I still feel like I need to do everything that I can to protect him. I just want to know if anyone has any ideas of what I can do. | ||||
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| You call child welfare - or whatever child protective services is called in his area - and you report the behavior. If you can prove your claims, that's good. If not, that's their job. Marijuana isn't legal in California unless a person has a prescription - there's a difference between being legal and being able to get a prescription. | ||||
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