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Can I adopt my fiancee's son?

Asked Jan 5, 2012, 02:01 PM — 6 Answers
Me and my girlfriend went to court today for a custody trial. She was granted full custody of her son and the father didn't ask for anything. He is also incarcerated. Can I adopt her kid so I can consider him my own? I've done some research but I'm not finding the answer I'm looking for!

6 Answers
JudyKayTee's Avatar
JudyKayTee Posts: 45,397, Reputation: 23548
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#2

Jan 5, 2012, 02:17 PM
No, you can't adopt a "kid" when you aren't married to the mother.

In some States you have to be married for over a year in order to adopt.

You also needs the written permission of the father - whether or not she has full custody. Adoption and custody are different matters.
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Fr_Chuck's Avatar
Fr_Chuck Posts: 72,597, Reputation: 37026
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#3

Jan 5, 2012, 02:19 PM


Normally the "kid" can be adopted after you are married and the bio father gives permission for the adoption
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ScottGem's Avatar
ScottGem Posts: 58,086, Reputation: 28135
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#4

Jan 5, 2012, 02:30 PM


ANY question on law needs to include your general locale as laws vary by area.

What you are asking about is a "step-parent" adoption. But to do that you have to be a step parent, not a fiancee. Of course without knowing where you are we don't know the applicable laws.

So, my advice to you is to set the wedding date and start shopping around for an attorney to prepare the adoption petition. The attorney will know what you have to do to qualify and how to get the bio father to sign off.
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Handyman2007's Avatar
Handyman2007 Posts: 778, Reputation: 342
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#5

Jan 6, 2012, 06:37 PM
You need to be married and be able to PROVE you would be a good parent. The Father must give permission or give up his parental rights before you can start adoption proceedings.
And you should show the courts a little respect and refer to him as the child.....not the "kid."
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AK lawyer's Avatar
AK lawyer Posts: 9,927, Reputation: 4212
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#6

Jan 6, 2012, 07:21 PM
Joserosay872512, to remember how it goes, ask yourself if "Me went to court today," would sound right. If not, throwing another person in the sentence wouldn't be right either. And then also remember that you should refer to the other person before yourself, as "my girlfriend and I went to court.
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JudyKayTee's Avatar
JudyKayTee Posts: 45,397, Reputation: 23548
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#7

Jan 7, 2012, 06:29 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Handyman2007 View Post
You need to be married and be able to PROVE you would be a good parent. The Father must give permission or give up his parental rights before you can start adoption proceedings.
And you should show the courts a little respect and refer to him as the child.....not the "kid."

Parents cannot "give up their parental rights." They sign a consent to the adoption at the time of the adoption and then they lose their rights.

It is set up in this fashion so that the custodial parent who wants to strip the other parent of his/her rights cannot get the non-custodial to "give up parental rights" to allow an adoption - and then never file for adoption.

If you have a source contrary to mine, please post it.
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