My boyfriend and I broke up I had a one night stand with my ex. Called my boyfriend the next morning and told him about it.

Two months later I found out I was pregnant. We went to the dr. asked the probable conception date and we were sure we slept together that day, but it was always slightly in the back of our minds the possibility(since the dates can be off).

Baby was born looking identical to my boyfriend. Boyfriend signed AOP and birth certificate.

A few months later his look started changing and I had to find out for sure. Took the paternity test with my ex (the one night stand) and the baby turned out to be his.

He wants NOTHING to do with my child, but does want to pay support. My boyfriend does not know we did the test. I asked my bf numerous times to do a test and he declines saying he loves "our" son no matter what. My boyfriend gets very furious when I bring up the probability of someone else being our sons father.

I can't live this lie anymore. I am at a loss as to what is best for my son. My boyfriend is an amazing father I would like him to know the truth but the truth will only hurt him as the one night stand is an alcoholic who lives hours away.

Please help me! I need some serious advice!! This lie is ruining my life. I cry myself to sleep daily.

amess

Thanks for all your replies. I am going to tell my boyfriend SOON! It's not if I am going to tell him, it is when!? I know I have to do it soon under the age guidlines anyways and I can't live a lie any longer.

One last question, I hope.

How long of a process will this be? Will there be multiple court appearances or is this something a lawyer can draft up the paperwork and everyone can sign? Will this take months or even years to get cs started, ect? My son is already one so I only have one year left.

stinawords

There will absolutely be multiple court appearances. The first will be to have the father determined to be the bio father where the DNA test will be ordered. The next will be to get the results and change the name on the birth certificate and probably establish support. If the judge doesn't have all the paperwork necessary to determine support at that time it may be at a third appearance. This is also when the judge will set up visitation for the bio father.

GV70

OK- I think your srate has adopted the UPA/statute of limitation,etc/.Some states allow "THREE PARTY AGREEMENT" to be made.
This kind of agreement needs to be registered in Court ONLY.

GV70

There is no need of lawyers,Court procedures...The government,CSEA and other services are interested in someone to pay, not in who pays.

amess

Ok, that brings me to will I be forced to change my sons last name? Bio dad already says he could careless what my sons last name is.

stinawords

You won't necessarily have to change it to bio dad's last name but the bio dad has to appear on the birth cirtificate. The judge will order that after the results are in from the paternaty test.

GV70

Who is interested in it?
I suppose after 20 years.

amess

I am interested in it. My son is not going to have someone's last name that has no interest or care for him...someone that says they do not have the time for him. No thank you!

If you would have read my previous posts you would have known I wanted to do something before my son was 2 and the time limit was up so I don't know what the I suppose after 20 years remark was for, rather rude I must say.

GV70

When did you say it? I can see only WOW-he is an alcoholic but he is good in bed and he has a lot of money...Your BF is an amazing father but
That's your biggest problem.You are self-concerned .You are not interested in others and the most important for you is MONEY.
Law Encyclopedia: Fraud
A false representation of a matter of fact — whether by words or by conduct, by false or misleading allegations, or by concealment of what should have been disclosed — that deceives and is intended to deceive another so that the individual will act upon it to her or his legal injury.

Fraud is commonly understood as dishonesty calculated for advantage. A person who is dishonest may be called a fraud. In the U.S. legal system, fraud is a specific offense with certain features.

A statement need not be affirmative to be fraudulent. When a person has a duty to speak, silence may be treated as a false statement. This can arise if a party who has knowledge of a fact fails to disclose it to another party who is justified in assuming its nonexistence.
I call your behaviour unfair and selfish.Just opinion/rude or not/

stinawords

GV is not rude. He is going by what you have been saying. This entire time you keep saying soon, soon, soon. He is right that you could be charged with fraud and if the bio dad wants to ask the judge that his name be changed to his last name (even though he told you he didn't care) the name is likely to be changed. Now if in court he really dosen't care, as I said you won't necessarily have to change it to his last name but he will have to be on the birth cirtificate.