http://www.askmehelpdesk.com en Sat, 21 Nov 2009 00:38:11 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.askmehelpdesk.com/amhd_imgs/misc/rss.jpg http://www.askmehelpdesk.com http://www.askmehelpdesk.com/mental-emotional-health/cant-leave-house-without-being-scared-417449.html Thu, 19 Nov 2009 14:58:34 GMT dear all, Being new to this site I am not too sure how this works but I desperately need help. Every day I wake up with the same fear circuling my mind and so far it o stop my succeeded to impact my life negatively. I am constantly nervous, anxious and crying with fear and I dont know how to... dear all,

Being new to this site I am not too sure how this works but I desperately need help.
Every day I wake up with the same fear circuling my mind and so far it o stop my succeeded to impact my life negatively. I am constantly nervous, anxious and crying with fear and I dont know how to stop myself thinking and just getting on wtih my life the way that I used to do before all this fear started. I know that I am thinker and worrier by nature but this is to the exteme. I cant leave my house without being scared and I cant go on like this for much longer. Each day I wake up with this overwheling sense of fear in my chest and I just cant push these pervasve thoughts out of my mind. I cant sit in a room or next to any girl for fear that I will be attracted to them ( including my best freind and my twin sister). My heart races at the thought and fills me with fear. I cant sit next to any boy for fear that I wont be attracted to them and it sca mind scares me so much. My life has become evolved around these thoughts and I dont know how much more I cant take. I'm afraid to go on dates because I'm afraid I wont be able to fancy them. I am quite shy and reserved by nature but my life has turned into constant tests ( will I be attrated to wont I be attracted to). I need help, I dont know how much more I can take.

PLEASE help me, I really need help.

whats wrong with me , is there something wrong with me?

thanks,
anxious girl ]]> anxious girl http://www.askmehelpdesk.com/mental-emotional-health/cant-leave-house-without-being-scared-417449.html http://www.askmehelpdesk.com/mental-emotional-health/shes-gone-417355.html Thu, 19 Nov 2009 04:32:39 GMT This is a story, about my life. Something that happened to me, and i hate dealing with by myself everyday. I have not had another girlfriend since her. It seems i can't, they all say "oh were just friends" /= im depressed.,


Sitting in the dull library on a Monday morning awaiting the color to come. I began to reminisce on just two nights ago. I lay beside her in the grass, I felt utter and complete contentment. Staring into a vast ocean of gleaming stars, her green eyes like an ever flowing spring, and i can’t stop swimming. Looking into her eyes I lost myself. With my fingers laced through hers we just laid there saying nothing, I was just complete. One question I had kept asking myself “Is this love? Does she love me?”
The ten minute bell interrupted the bliss, realizing that the room was still colorless and dull. Her absence brought a deep sense of desolation to my morning. What am I supposed to do without her? I got up and dragged myself out of the library, trying to get through the day as normal as possible. But what was normal? Normal was sharing as many heartbeats as we could together. Overtime she ahd become my best friend, my love, she was the fiber of my soul, the very reason for my existence.
“She’s sick that’s it, she will call me tonight.” I kept telling myself as an attempt to regain composure, but that’s not what stuck. “She hates me” My lugubrious subconscious had convinced me.
Weeks dragged by without any color in my life. When i thought apathy had finally made a home in my heart and thought maybe i won’t have to care anymore, I saw her. All self-control left me, I ran up to her and wrapped my longing arms around her small frame and held her tight. I hadn’t cared if she hated me. I wasn’t even thinking about that at the time, alls that mattered was that she was there in my arms. Only to come to the realization that arms were still hanging down by her side. I looked up desperately only to see her leave from my arms, turn and run out the doors taking with her all composure that had remained. I collapsed to the floor and cried. I didn’t care if anyone was watching. I just sat there in the middle of the hall and cried my heart out.
The rest of the week walking to class or doing anything seemed as though I was just a bystander to my own life. I expressed no kind of emotion. Life was so surreal I just wanted to wake up, that’s all I wanted now. I was hopelessly awaiting for dawn to break to shine some light in the shadow that is now my life.
After getting home from school, as I usually did, I went up stairs and laid in my bed falling asleep, a deep dreamless sleep.
Later that night i awoke to a darkened sky, and a missed call. my heart pounded as i saw it was from her.
I quickly called back got no answer so i checked the voicemail,

“This is Amber’s mother i really felt obligated to tell you what happened before we leave. Amber on her way home from the movies with her father, for his birthday, was crossing through an intersection and a drunk driver slammed through her side of the car smashing her head, cracking the windshield. She lost all of her memory.. her father and i have decided to move her away, maybe give her a new start. please don’t try to contact her, we feel its for the best.”

the click echoed in my ears..I didn’t know anything anymore. My fear of being alone had become so normal, now had jumped to a whole new level.. The fear is now my life. My life is now fear, now i am alone. no one else can remember how we sang to each other every night. no one can remember how your hand felt in mine. no one else will ever really know what it is we had except for me now. i am alone. i am. i. . ]]> aaronf http://www.askmehelpdesk.com/mental-emotional-health/shes-gone-417355.html http://www.askmehelpdesk.com/mental-emotional-health/just-tired-417034.html Wed, 18 Nov 2009 07:09:32 GMT I am just tired of living, I don't feel like doing anything, I don't even feel like killing myself. It would be extremely easy and I still wont do it. I don't think I am going to my Army drills any more, or classes. I have just lost interest in doing anything, I have almost lost interest in getting help. People say it's not weak to ask for help, but the reasons I am asking for help make me weak.

Seriously, what kind if guy who has no work ethic, no interest in life, always lazy, not doing his work, being selfish all the time, thinking about stupid . Do you really want me leading soldiers in battle, I don't want me leading soldiers in battle. I wouldn't put me in charge of anything. A guy like me who screws up a great thing like I have doesn't deserve a second chance. People tell me I am smart with my head on straight. Too bad perception is reality. Whatever I just really find it hard to just care. I really don't have a reason to not care, or to be in the state I am in. The lack of reason kind of is the reason. I can't even read 5 pages in a book without loosing interest. I'm probably going to get some stupid response from one of you saying that I am just being negative and I need to have a positive outlook on life. Well before you post, you can have the most positive outlook on yourself and your life, that just makes you a fool. I am being a realist, I am giving you my problems, I am not here to tell you about how great I am. I don't want attention and I don't really want anything for that matter. It's just that it would be nice knowing that I am not going to be sent to prison for going AWOL, and that I might be able to force myself to do something. As far as I can see I am going to need a lot of brainwashing and heavy medication, but it's doable I think.

Well I am just interested what your opinions are. I really don't feel like seeing a shrink so don't expect me to do that. ]]> seenbutnotheard http://www.askmehelpdesk.com/mental-emotional-health/just-tired-417034.html