My son is turning 1 in a few weeks and I'm planning on having a small gathering here at my house. Of course at this age, he's not aware of it being his birthday so I'm keeping the celebration small (only 10-15 family/close friends). I'm not planning a huge party or anything; just a cake and grilling some burgers & hot dogs.

I want to know if there is a tactful way to request that guests not buy him a bunch of toys and clothes. He has plenty of both and being honest, I have a small house, so I really don't want a bunch of toys that he's not even interested in cluttering our tiny space. And at his age, he's more interested in playing with a hairbrush than some fancy-schmancy electronic gizmo. Is there a kind way to ask guests to make a contribution to his college fund or purchase a gift card (that can be used at a later date for things he'll NEED) rather than splurging unnecessarily on toys and such??

Fr_Chuck

I am sorry, it sounds like you are having a picnic with friends and trying to call it a birthday party.. 1, this should be the one where he has his own little cake and makes a total mess with photos, one where the party is about him, and where he gets all types of toys even if some are not played with.

nikosmom

Yeah, it pretty much is a cook-out, because he doesn't know it's his birthday! He IS going to have cake and photos. I still would like to know if there is a way to handle the situation. I would prefer that guests didn't give him the toys not because I just don't want him to have them, because I don't have room to store this stuff.

ISneezeFunny

To be honest, I kinda agree with Fr in that since he's turning 1...it should be "all about him"...don't you want to look back at the picture 5 years from now and laugh about it?

As far as gifts, perhaps you can make a gift registry...and get things that he needs or will need later on.

Altenweg

If I was invited to a first birthday and told to bring gift card in lieu of a gift I'd be pretty shocked. A child's first birthday is special, it's a milestone and should be celebrated as such. Toys are fun, and people love to buy toys for a 1 year old, a gift card or donating toward his college fund just seems so impersonal.

nikosmom

There are going to be plenty of pictures. That doesn't make my house grow to accomodate junk. The question remains: is there a tactful way to handle the quandry? Let me give you guys some background: I got a lot of toys and clothes at my baby shower and for [him] Christmas. So much, that he STILL has things that he's too little to play with and clothes that he still hasn't worn. So maybe that clears things up, I just don't have the room to store things that he doesn't need right now.

nikosmom

Thanks Alten, I see your point. You at least addressed my question. That's why I'm here, because I DON't want to offend the guests... but my house doesn't have much storage and I've got so many clothes and toys stuffed into closets now!

Altenweg

Here's a possible answer.

Let the guests come, let them bring whatever they want, let your 1 year old rip open presents and have a blast, take lots of pictures and video.

Once all the guests have left, pick one or two items that your child seems to adore and that are age appropriate, things he can use right away. Give the rest to charity, there are so many kids out there with nothing. No one needs to know but you, and that way no one will feel hurt, you won't be stuck with tons of toys and clothes and some needy kids will get a wonderful gift as well.

Just a thought.

N0help4u

I was going to suggest the same thing that Alten said basically.
Let them bring what they want and then go through his old stuff and give what he is starting to outgrow to the Salvation Army or a family with a newborn.
If you have a decent size yard and no outdoor toys maybe you could tell the guests it is a summer theme and outdoor toys would be preferred.

nikosmom

That's a great idea Nohelp! I have a nice-sized backyard so that'd help more than having to stuff more stuff into closets etc. Alten, I was starting to think along the same line, that maybe once all is said and done I could give some to charity. So now my question is this: is there a tactful way to request that they bring outside toys or the like? This brings me back to my original position of not wanting to offend anyone. Is there a way to politely "suggest" certain types of gifts??