Is it wrong to put gift cards on your registry? If not what percentage is OK to ask for gift cards versus actual gifts?

I do not think putting a gift card on your wedding registry, or any registry, is proper etiquette. Giving a gift card is up to the giver. If you have the registery, the giver can easily access that and select what they feel they can afford.

If I were to receive such a notation on a gift registry, I would ignore it, to be very honest. I am completely capable of deciding whether to buy a gift card or a gift from the registry.

Now, I don't know about the USA because I am European.
I do know that people in Europe ask for gift cards or even money... Having said that: asking for money to me is a bit low class, it's not nice because it can bring people in an awkward situation... "how much money do I give ..." The least one wants is to make people who are being invited to a party feel uncomfortable...

So... what happens is that at a gift registration there is also the possibility to give a gift card... which is fine in Europe... etiquette there is not to open the envelop in the presence of the person who gives it...

Money for me would be a big NO...
Gift cards... why not ?

I would like to give you the benefit of the doubt.. however... what does one do when a couple who gets married has already been living together for such a long time and "have it all..."

Maybe they would like to buy one big piece from a specific shop ?
Would that be so incredibly inappropriate ?
Would love to hear what the proper etiquette is in a situation like this ?

Being from Europe I notice that we have completely different rules for etiquette... take a look at the way Europeans hold their cutlery and Americans and you will see there already such a huge difference so I can imagine that in other situations what we do in Europe may be perceived as rude or not so polite in the US.

Thanks :) :)

Judith Martin, the doyenne of etiquette known to millions as Miss Manners, dismisses gift certificates -- and, by extension, gift cards -- as "a pathetic compromise convenient to people who do not trust their judgment about selecting the right present for those whose tastes they ought to know."

Think about it. Would a lover, in the flush of romance, lean close to the object of his affection and present … a gift card? Would proud grandparents present the latest addition to the family with … a gift card? Would your best and closest friend, the one you've known for years, who's stuck with you through the roller-coaster ride of life, walk into your hospital room and give you … a gift card?

Many young people are so enamored with gift cards, with being "empowered to make their own choices," as one retailer laughably put it, that they don't even realize what they're missing.

Older people might, but hey, they're busy, cards are convenient, so what's the harm?

The harm is that the art of gift-giving is quickly devolving into an entirely commercial exchange. How much longer until we simply start thrusting wads of dollar bills at each other?

Some people, apparently, would be delighted with that prospect. While researching party themes for my daughter's upcoming celebration, I stumbled across a posting by a woman who proudly included the horrifying words "monetary gifts would be much appreciated" on her 3 year-old child's invitations. She went on to explain that "I wanted money as gifts for my daughter's savings and for us to buy bigger toys, like a big kitchen and a Barbie Jeep that she wanted, instead of guests giving her small toys."

It's official. Shame is dead.

So says Miss Manners.

I think adding a couple of gift cards is fine. Some people won't want to hunt down items on the list.

I wouldn't be offended if I saw on a registry that there were a few gift cards... but I think your registry should be mostly items of interest. Then, even if the cards are already checked off, another person wanting to buy one could still get a gift card if they wished, knowing you had listed it.

Usually, when you are registering for gifts, there is a box to check if you would like to receive gift cards. When the registry prints from the kiosk or if the clerk prints it for you, the registry will have a note that says something to the effect of "Gift cards are also available for the bride and groom. Please see an associate if you would like to purchase a gift card for the couple." Maybe register for a few gifts and then check the gift card box and then most people will get the hint that you would prefer gift cards. It is not usually appropriate to ask for gift cards or money instead of gifts.

I agree with Green Eyes. Just have the store market that gift cards are available and then it's taken care of. All the stores have the option.

On the subject of gift giving, in general, I wish my daughter didn't get all these toys every year and instead get $ for a college fund. But I would NEVER ask for that. I think she would be disappointed and I think it would be rude. But - secretly - I do wish that she would get more money for her savings account.

Do not ask for anything specific. Registering is appropriate because some people appreciate knowing what you would chose but you should not be advertising where you are registered in your invitations - it should be shared by other people by word of mouth, by hosts of showers or so on. If people don't want a gift to wrap, they will probably give you cash. Then you can buy your own gift card.

Keep in mind that most of your gifts will be returnable so if there's something you would rather have, you can do an exchange. Be sensitive about who's gift you exchange though - not worth hurting someone.