| I don't think it makes sense to presume that letting siblings know that they are planning something for their mutual parents, and would like everyone to be there for the benefit of those parents, is really the kind of invitation that requires the planners to put everyone up or feed them. If this were the case, a lot of families couldn't get together because the expectations would be hard for many people to meet.
I lived 400 miles from my family for many years. I knew I could always stay with my parents, as they had extended a standing invitation to me and my small family and had room for us. However, other's also invited us to things in our home state frequently such as get togethers at restaurants, christenings for their children, weddings, family reunions and more. These invitations normally required that we pay our own way and arrange our own accomodations.
Unless the invitation is, "we'd love to have you come and visit us, we have plenty of room!", or "we'd like you to join us for a dinner honoring Mom and Dad, our treat", you should assume that while your relatives want to include you, the expectation will be that all but those being honored will be on their own financially and in terms of accomodations.
In general, I find that families are so different - in one family a lot is implied that is not at all understood or traditional in another. If it's not your own family of origin, I'd suggest that if anything is in question, clarify it. For example, in this case, you might ask, "do you know if anyone might have room for us, or would we need to find a hotel?", or, "what do you anticipate the cost will be for the restaurant?" Asking in this way, you are not presuming any accomodations but rather information.
Hope that helps! | 
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