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Home > Society & Culture > Etiquette   »   Dinner invitation?

 
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Old Apr 28, 2007, 06:39 PM
DI720
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Dinner invitation?

I received a dinner invitation on my answering machine from a friend I generally see every few months. It was to be at her home in 21/2 weeks. As I was away when the message was left, I returned her call about 4 days later once I was home. I reached her answering machine, expressed my apologies for the slight delay in responding and also gratitude and acceptance for her invite. This was about 12 days before the dinner date. I said I would call again within a week to speak to her personally. Exactly one week early of the invited date, I received a message expressing the time she was expecting me to arrive THAT night! A second message to my cell phone a few minutes later, expressed her confusion as to whether or not she had invited me that evening or a week later. But that I was welcome to both, as she apparently was hosting two different parties. It was weird but I called and verified that I had been invited to the later dinner and apologized (?) for not being available this evening. During the conversation, she definitely sounded distant. I feel really weird about the invite at this point and not sure how to handle next week's dinner invite. Any suggestions or thoughts on what is going on?

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Old Apr 28, 2007, 07:02 PM   #2  
Fr_Chuck
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They most likely felt alittle stupid confusing which dinner you were invited to. I know I would have been, go to the dinner and injoy yourself,

But again a friend you only see every few months would not be a very close friend anyway that I would image ( could be wrong)

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DI720 agrees: This was an honest, objective and insightful assessment . Thanks, it helped!
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Old Apr 29, 2007, 06:51 AM   #3  
RubyPitbull
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DI, please go to the dinner party you were invited to.

It might have been a weird conversation because she was embarrassed, as Fr Chuck points out. Think about it. Most people who are aware of proper ettiquette, know that you don't mention a party to a person if you are not inviting them. It is hurtful to do so. Possibly, she thought you might be hurt that you were invited to one and not the other. Another possibility, not knowing her age, she may also be worried that she is getting forgetful and confused. I am sure her response was not in any way intended to disinvite you. If it was, she wouldn't have called you in the first place and then followed up with a subsequent call, inviting you to both parties. Be a friend and go to that party. Don't worry about it. Laugh it off if she appears embarrassed or distant, and give her a hug. Since she appears to be a lady who likes to throw dinner parties, she is probably just upset she committed a faux pas.

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DI720 agrees: Very helpful! I appreciate your consideration of all the nuances of the situation. And being objective it helped me to see solution clearly - go and enjoy! Thank you.
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