Dear expert:
Recently, I am kind of disturbed and contradicted.　As I am a woman, of course, I do want 100% equality in job opportunities and other areas of life as well. However, I am not totally sure if it is right that for me to get benefits of traditional courtship, like being treated for dinners, or should I fight for the check, pay for it to prove my financial viability???
From a doubtful Asian woman　

Starman

Yes it's OK for a woman to accept traditional courtesies.
It's part of what makes a women attractive.
Being too competitive will drive most men away.

kp2171

its fine to accept but you sound uncomfortable w the concept.

you can always split things up... guys probably like to buy dinner, you can score the movie tickets.

when my daughter went to HS dances the guys always bought the tickets, but we made sure she'd pay for the pictures.

in the end, if you are uncomfortable accepting these things, find a compromise like i mentioned... if the guy is frustrated, then he's probably not in line with your thinking anyway.

my wife says she went through a phase in her life before me when she had to prove she could do about anything and be independent. she says this jokingly now because she no longer cares to prove she can take out the trash, unclog a toilet, or clean up after the dog... shes more than happy to let me do it. =)

fredg

HI, all,
This original question is 3 years old!