Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    Favorite girl's Avatar
    Favorite girl Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Apr 8, 2007, 06:31 AM
    Sudden change
    Hi,
    I started seeing my boyfriend in November and things have been going on well until February. I was really scared about going into the relationship because we are in different states and I've never been in a long distance relationship before. He assured me we would cope and he came to see me a couple of times. In janury I decided to go see him and then I made up my mind to be serious about him and love him. But I noticed after I got back that a few weeks later we started having issues, we said it was the distance and all but it didn't get beta. He no longer used to call like he used to but I kind of understood because it cld cost a lot spmetimes. Nywys recently we had a fight over the fphone because I told him I was confused and didn't know what to do and he said the distance isn't easy for him. Well we hardly talk now, he doesn't atke my calls, I send him the usual loving text I used to but he just replies like am his buddie. I'm really confused, don't know what to think because I feel I've let my guards down by loving him this much.
    TheSavage's Avatar
    TheSavage Posts: 564, Reputation: 96
    Senior Member
     
    #2

    Apr 8, 2007, 06:38 AM
    Be honest -- What is there to be confused about? He has moved on but you have not.

    Any true relationship requires letting your guard down but sadly that's when all of us get hurt,and we grow a bit wiser each time I hope.- Savage
    Casper718's Avatar
    Casper718 Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #3

    Apr 8, 2007, 06:32 PM
    man if I had I nickel for every time I heard that long distance relationship don't work well I would have still bin here =)... Im was in a long distance relationship let me tell you it isn't fun... Its more hard work then the loving part... It take to VERY specail people to work out a long distance... First thing is Trust second thing is putting the relationship first when its your choice, And lasty you can't wonder and have suspiuos feeling, those things destroy the fundamentals of a lasting relationship, man if I had a girl that would sent me loving text messages and said that she cared about me well I might have been in the relationship still. Your I good girl from the sounds of it, he doesn't see that... Maybe trying lookin' for someone in the same area code maNY guys would love your style of love... The good guys anyway... Hope I Helped Happy EAster and God Bless
    Favorite girl's Avatar
    Favorite girl Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #4

    Apr 9, 2007, 12:02 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by TheSavage
    Be honest -- What is there to be confused about? He has moved on but you have not.

    Any true relationship requires letting your guard down but sadly thats when all of us get hurt,and we grow a bit wiser each time I hope.- Savage
    Hi savage, thank you so much for your response. I don't just give up like that because he could truly be going through stress like he said and people handle stress differntly and moreover he sent me a text ystrdy although he still sounded like he was talking to his buddie. So I have decided to go see him and hear things for myself. At least when I'm looking at him, he can't pretend for so long? After the trip Ill make up my mind. Cheers
    Favorite girl's Avatar
    Favorite girl Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #5

    Apr 9, 2007, 12:10 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Casper718
    man if i had i nickle for every time i heard that long distance relationship dont work well i would of still bin here =).....Im was in a long distance relationship let me tell you it aint fun....Its more hard work then the loving part.....It take to VERY specail ppl to work out a long distance.....First thing is Trust second thing is putting the relationship first when its ur choice, And lasty you can't wonder and have suspiuos feeling, those things destory the fundamentals of a lasting relationship, man if i had a girl that would sent me loving text messages and said that she cared about me well I might have been in the relationship still. Your i good girl from the sounds of it, he doesnt see that.....Maybe tryin lookin' fo some1 in the same area code maNY guys would love ur stlye of love.....The good guys anyways.....Hope i Helped Happy EAster and God Bless
    Thanks a lot casper at least u've been in my shoes before so u'll probably know how I feel. Its just that its not easy to just give up like that so I've decided since I really love him,I'll go see him and hear things for myself. After that I'll make up my mind if to move on or continue the relationship. I have this weakness of making excuses for people and giving them benefit of doubt. So when I see him I would be able to tell because at least I woul feel if the connection is there ir not. Cheers
    Casper718's Avatar
    Casper718 Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #6

    Apr 9, 2007, 12:20 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Favorite girl
    Thanks alot casper atleast u've been in my shoes before so u'll probably know how i feel. Its just that its not easy to just give up like that so i've decided since i really love him,i'll go see him and hear things for myself. After that i'll make up my mind if to move on or continue the relationship. I have this weakness of making excuses for people and giving them benefit of doubt. so wen i see him i would be able to tell cos at least i woul feel if the connection is there ir not. Cheers
    Well I wish you the best of luck... God knows that I still ain't over my long distance relationship there's something that hold us (and by us I mean the people who give it all for the long distance relationship to work) together... I have no idea what it is... Just a work of advice Stay strong because I remenber when my girlfriend and I where fighting and I flew in its like nothing happened and that magic spark started up and we forgot the fight... And it was big like Wanting to break up, Wanted a break, and even that we both didn't want to see each other... Stay strong don't do anything that will mess up the first reason why you going there... Because we people have a special force and that's that we give and give with the worng person the give just gives and nothing bonces back... So try to find out is he the wall(which in the part is good because you give and like a ball it comes back with better forces) or ih he an open space that nothing happens... GOOD LUCK and I hope EVERYthing for the best... Contact me and tell me what happened
    Favorite girl's Avatar
    Favorite girl Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #7

    Apr 9, 2007, 01:35 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Casper718
    Well i wish you the best of luck.....God knows that i still ain't over my long distance relationship there's something that hold us (and by us i mean the ppl who give it all for the long distance relationship to work) together....I have no idea what it is...Just a work of advice Stay strong because i remenber when my girlfriend and I where fighting and i flew in its like nothing happened and that magic spark started up and we forgot the fight.....And it was big like Wanting to break up, Wanted a break, and even that we both didnt want to see each other......Stay strong dont do anything that will mess up the first reason why you going there......Cuz we ppl have a special force and that's that we give and give with the worng person the give just gives and nothing bonces back....So try to find out is he the wall(which in the part is good because you give and like a ball it comes back with better forces) or ih he an open space that nothing happens....GOOD LUCK and I hope EVERYthing fo the best.......Contact me and tell me what happened
    I won't get to see him till this weekend because of work but thanks a lot casper I definitely will tell you what happened. I really hope I'm doing the right thing and it works out for the best. Cheers
    Casper718's Avatar
    Casper718 Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #8

    Apr 9, 2007, 04:10 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Favorite girl
    I wont get to see him till this weekend cos of work but thanks alot casper i definately will tell u wat happened. I really hope i'm doing the right thing and it works out for the best. Cheers

    BUt remenber if I see the way things happened with me, u've been apart for a long time and that phyiscal bond will reopen the scar and Be strong because before you know it you guys might be back in each other arms and then once you leave its going to slowly go back to what you been be4 the trip... In Pain... Im hoping for the best but the best might not be the happiest one =/
    Favorite girl's Avatar
    Favorite girl Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #9

    Apr 23, 2007, 01:38 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Casper718
    BUt remenber if i see the way things happened with me, u've been apart fo a long time and that phyiscal bond will reopen the scar and Be strong because before you know it ya guys might be back in each other arms and then once you leave its going to slowly go back to what you been be4 the trip.....In Pain...Im hoping fo the best but the best might not be the happiest one =/

    Hi casper how have you been? I eventually went to see my boyfriend last weekend and thank Gpd things are sorted out.
    I actually surprised him wit my visit because he was'nt expecting me. I told him I just wanted to find out what we are doing and I'll leave. We did a lot of talking and he kept apologising and saying he just didn't handle the distance thing very well. He begged me to give him a second chance. I intend to give him another chance but I'll be really careful this time because I don't want to get hurt.
    I hope I'm doing the right thing, I guess I'll just watch and see if he actually changes for the better.
    Thank you so mch casper, would still keep you posted on any developments.
    Casper718's Avatar
    Casper718 Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #10

    Apr 23, 2007, 05:33 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Favorite girl
    hi casper how have you been? i eventually went to see my boyfriend last weekend and thank Gpd things are sorted out.
    I actually suprised him wit my visit cos he was'nt expecting me. I told him i just wanted to find out wat we are doing and i'll leave. We did alot of talking and he kept apologising and saying he just didnt handle the distance thing very well. He begged me to give him a second chance. I intend to give him another chance but i'll be really careful this time cos i dont want to get hurt.
    I hope i'm doing the right thing, i guess i'll just watch and see if he actually changes for the better.
    Thank you so mch casper, would still keep you posted on any developments.


    I'm glad to help... Keep your head up... and always think positive... Keep in me in the know about all what happens... I've been living day by day... Hope your doing good

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Add your answer here.


Check out some similar questions!

Sudden Changes in her. [ 3 Answers ]

Well we been married for almost 8 years and we have a son of 4 years old, in all this years we were very good in all the parts of our family, we shared everything and like I said no problems at all, until one day we got in a very heated fight and we ended there, she went back to her mother house...

Sudden change in urinating outside of crate [ 3 Answers ]

My puppy is about six months old, and we trained her to use a crate (litter box) and she was doing great, she would always go in there, but the last couple of days she wouldn't use it, she would sometimes go to it but then leave and go on the carpet or sometimes even just step her front half in and...

Sudden behavior change [ 2 Answers ]

OK, so as my name might indicate, I know a lot more about dogs than I do about cats, nonetheless through interesting circumstances I have ended up with this kitten. The kitten is female, thusfar unspayed, calico and roughly 6 mo. Old. I have had her for about 5 mo. Now, and she has always been...

A sudden change.. . [ 24 Answers ]

The other night, my girlfriend of two years told me that she wanted to have a break. Now I have never had to deal with this so I am not quite sure what this means. She said she didn't love me anymore the way she did for so long and needed time to figure things out. However she did say she still...

Sudden change in cat's behavior [ 2 Answers ]

Several months ago I adopted a cat from the humane society - shortly after I got her - she stopped eating, so I took her to the humane society vet clinic. It turned out her bone marrow stopped producing red blood cells and she was Jaundice - and had to be put to sleep. The humane society said I...


View more questions Search