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    kcbguy's Avatar
    kcbguy Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Dec 29, 2006, 07:19 PM
    Help second dog cope with sister dog's death
    I had 2 dogs for 10 years. They are sisters, One recently died during surgery and now other does not understand where first dog is, it has been 5 days, she is very sad. Help with anyone who has been through same grateful
    Allheart's Avatar
    Allheart Posts: 1,639, Reputation: 436
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    #2

    Dec 29, 2006, 07:48 PM
    Hi KC,

    First, I am deeply sorry for the loss of your dog. I know the sadness and my heartfelt sympathy.

    Yes, I did have two dogs at the one time. They were not blood related, but my male dog just loved his little "sister". He was heartbroken when she passed. He would go in the back of the yard and stand over the spot where she would "tinkle" and do what looked like howling. It just broke our hearts. Well, of course we tried to give him added attention. But then we just couldn't stand watching him look all over the house for her, soooo, we got another little puppy and he went right into big brother mode again. The little puppy gave him a run for his money, but boy it brought the life right back to him. He was 10 years old when we got the little puppy. And it made a world of difference. He is now in doggy heaven as well.

    Now, I have just the one again, and we were going to get her a little playmate, but she was different from her brother. She loved him and was not having any parts of a new puppy. I think she quite enjoys being the only little princess.

    I hope this helps in someway. Again, I am so so sorry.
    labman's Avatar
    labman Posts: 10,580, Reputation: 551
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    #3

    Dec 29, 2006, 08:05 PM
    Every case is different. At 10 years old, our Aster was not pleased to have a new puppy in the house. Of course, she lived most of her life as an only dog. You might look into an older dog. By 3 they have lost interest in the puppy biting games most old dogs don't care for. That still give you many good years with the dog.

    One of the best sources for dogs with a predictable personality is the rescue
    Dogs. These are dogs that lost their home, but were taken into a foster home
    To be retrained as necessary and placed in the right home for them. You may
    Find a rescue near you starting at
    American Kennel Club - Breed Rescue The rescues charge a fee to help cover their expenses, but is much less than the price of a puppy plus all its medical expenses the first year.

    There is Petfinder.com: Adopt a pet and help an animal shelter rescue a puppy or kitten. plus your local shelter.
    Allheart's Avatar
    Allheart Posts: 1,639, Reputation: 436
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    #4

    Dec 29, 2006, 08:18 PM
    Labman,

    You are so right, each case is different. We did look into the shelters and resuces, but for some reason he wanted nothing to do with older dogs and if they were bigger, forget it. He just did better playing the big brother role. I always said He helped raise our little puppy. Whenever she would get into something, he would stand over her and bark... too funny.
    Again, you are right, with the puppy biting him, but we watched over that very closely and he took but so much and then would give her a type of bark that she knew "play time was over" and she would just scamper away.

    Your suggestion with the shelter and rescue is excellent!
    badams007's Avatar
    badams007 Posts: 106, Reputation: 12
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    #5

    Dec 31, 2006, 07:56 AM
    I always encourage folks to check into shelters and rescues who have their dogs fostered.

    As a foster parent, I am in a much better position to give accurate feedback about the true temperament of the dog in a household setting than can be had at a shelter with only a kennel situation (unless the dog is the staff favorite and gets to hang out in the office)

    -Beth
    Allheart's Avatar
    Allheart Posts: 1,639, Reputation: 436
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    #6

    Dec 31, 2006, 08:37 AM
    Badams,

    I do so agree with that thought process. If I didn't currently have a dog (and I do not have children) then, I think any source would be fine (with good research of course). But since we did have our little guy arleady, we were very hesitant about the kennels, as we thought it would be unfair to our little guy, if the kennel dog never demonstarted adverse behaviour to other pets in the kennel, but when you brought him or her home, would "act out" on our little guy. We just didn't want to take that chance. So yes, I agree in that situation, a foster home, is a much better source. That's just how we were thinking, not saying we were right, but we wanted to be sure to do things in the best interest of our little guy at home first.
    animal advocate's Avatar
    animal advocate Posts: 43, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Jan 1, 2007, 01:37 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by kcbguy
    I had 2 dogs for 10 years. They are sisters, One recently died during surgery and now other does not understand where first dog is, it has been 5 days, she is very sad. Help with anyone who has been through same grateful
    I know this might sound strange but sometimes if they see their friend dead they understand better what happened and will begin to accept it. Then they can grieve and get over it. If they don't get to say "goodbye" some dogs are very confused and don't understand. Just like a person would be.

    Maybe getting another dog will help but maybe not. It depends on her. Was she ever interested in interacting with other dogs, other than her sister? How does she react around other dogs? Probably taking her to a new dogs foster home and watching her reaction is the best way to know. She may be thrilled to find a new companion or she may not want anyone else. I agree that each situation is unique just as each dog is unique.

    I hope you can help her get through her sadness.
    Please keep us updated on her progress.

    Molly
    megsy_81's Avatar
    megsy_81 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Jan 20, 2007, 03:17 AM
    I never thought I would ever have to research into this topic.

    On the 16/01/07 our beloved 13 yr old Lab passed away.

    4 years ago I bought my little sausage dog to keep the lab company as he was getting on in years.

    Cassie (my sausage dog) was there and watched Barney (lab) pass away and she has not been the same girl since.

    All she does is lay around and sleep, won't go for walks, play or even eat. It breaks my heart to see her like this. She even broke out of the back yard when we were at work yesterday to search for her big brother.

    I don't know what I can do to help my little princess out. My family are not ready to get another dog, as they feel it would be trying to replace him to quickly.

    Any suggestions to bring back my happy, playfull little girl?

    Megan
    Allheart's Avatar
    Allheart Posts: 1,639, Reputation: 436
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    #9

    Jan 20, 2007, 03:34 AM
    Oh Megsy I am so sorry for the passing of Barney. I know he must have been a special guy and you sound like you and your family gave him lots of love, so take comfort in that.

    If a new dog will not work right now, I would just shower Cassie with lots and lots of attention. Hugs, and kisses and try and do things to distract her. Ger her a couple of new toys, she may not want to play with them, but lay on the floor with her and play with the toys just to distract her. She eventually will come around just give it more time.

    Again, so sorry about your loss.
    animal advocate's Avatar
    animal advocate Posts: 43, Reputation: 1
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    #10

    Jan 20, 2007, 10:25 AM
    If Cassie was a puppy when you got her Barney may have been her leader. Did she seem to always defer to him? Or did she boss him around? If the first, them she is probably really lost with no leader.

    Give her plenty of attention and don't leave her alone anymore than necessary. It is probably very difficult for her to be left alone since dogs instinctively like to be in packs.

    Give her time, she needs to grieve and time will help. If she doesn't seem to improve in a couple of weeks find a behavior specialist to help get through this.

    In the mean time take her for walks, get new toys, take her for rides in the car, things that might distract you would probably help her. You might look into doggie day care for awhile, or someone to come and walk her while you are at work.

    Poor little girl. You can't tell her she will feel better in awhile, but she will.

    Please let us know how she is doing.

    Hope this helps,
    Molly
    Buster Brown's Avatar
    Buster Brown Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #11

    Nov 29, 2007, 10:49 AM
    Just wanted to say, thank you. I lost my 3 year old Buster yesterday and we have been having a hard time dealing with it. I also was real worried about his brother Shadow and how he would cope. Buster was a great dog and a good friend, he and his brother were super tight and did everything together. We had Buster euthanized and brought him home to bury him. We wrapped him up in his favorite blanket and let Shadow sniff him and lick his face. I'm not sure he knew that Buster was gone. We buried him in the back yard and had a ceremony, but we are still having a rough time. I can't even keep tears out of my eyes to type this. Shadow whines now and looks for his brother. I took some time off work for yesterday and today to take care of Buster and to be with Shadow. I gave Shadow a bath today and after he ran around all excited like they used to he went back to the closed bathroom door and whined, waiting for Buster to come out. I don't know if he will hang in there, we usually kept them crated in a large crate while we were at work, but I am afraid Shadow will be so lonely without his buddy. I thought of putting a stuffed animal in with him but he tends to chew those up. I'm just so sad and I know life will go on but this was one of the hardest things I have had to do. I can't type anymore, its too hard. Thanks for this page. I love you Buster Brown.
    labman's Avatar
    labman Posts: 10,580, Reputation: 551
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    #12

    Nov 29, 2007, 12:27 PM
    In The Other end of the Leash, by Patricia B. McConnell, Ph.D. she suggests letting the surviving dog see and sniff the other one.
    RubyPitbull's Avatar
    RubyPitbull Posts: 3,575, Reputation: 648
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    #13

    Nov 29, 2007, 12:31 PM
    My goodness! You made me cry with your post BB. I am so sorry for the pain you are in. Buster was a gorgeous dog. Take comfort in Shadow. He does need you now. You both can help each other through the healing process. Again, I am so sorry for your loss.
    bushg's Avatar
    bushg Posts: 3,433, Reputation: 596
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    #14

    Nov 29, 2007, 01:43 PM
    BB I am very sorry for your loss. I have had to have a dog put down before and it is one of the sadest things I have ever went through in my life. Try to take solace in the fact that you were so close to your dog and did what was best for him in his time of ultimate need.
    As for Shadow spend a little extra time with him doing his favorite activities.
    Buster Brown's Avatar
    Buster Brown Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #15

    Nov 29, 2007, 03:05 PM
    Thanks guys, I appreciate your kind words. Putting down your dog is the hardest thing, the second is burying him. I know he is done with the pain and in a better place, I just wish he could have gotten better to be around longer. Thanks again.
    Allheart's Avatar
    Allheart Posts: 1,639, Reputation: 436
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    #16

    Nov 29, 2007, 04:12 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Buster Brown
    Thanks guys, I appreciate your kind words. Putting down your dog is the hardest thing, the second is burying him. I know he is done with the pain and in a better place, I just wish he could have gotten better to be around longer. Thanks again.
    What a beautiful beautiful baby your Buster Brown was and is and will always be, especially in your heart. You just take great comfort in knowing that you gave him the very best home and a love that he would have never known if he was not a part of your family.

    Bless you for the love and care you gave buster. Really isn't too many words that we can write to give you comfort. Just know our hearts are right there with you and feel and know your pain.

    Have your cry and know that every tear that falls just represents how very much you love your Buster Brown.

    Many hugs.
    Buster Brown's Avatar
    Buster Brown Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #17

    Nov 29, 2007, 09:39 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Allheart
    What a beautiful beautiful baby your Buster Brown was and is and will always be, especially in your heart. You just take great comfort in knowing that you gave him the very best home and a love that he would have never known if he was not a part of your family.

    Bless you for the love and care you gave buster. Really isn't too many words that we can write to give you comfort. Just know our hearts are right there with you and feel and know your pain.

    Have your cry and know that every tear that falls just represents how very much you love your Buster Brown.

    Many hugs.
    Wow, you are very kind, thank you.

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