My wife has left me and wants a divorce. She now has an apartment and is coming in to the house and getting her belongings. Which I agree on her getting her personal things. However can she just come in get what she wants when I am not here? I am not sure if she will gather up everything and leave me with nothing. Can the locks be changed? She is has left me. i reside in texas. She says she will file for the divorce. I don't want the divorce due to it is a sin unless she is had an affair. She has told me she will file. Need to know my rights to the belongings of the house. She also said that she dosn't want the house. So I can keep it. she cant afford it as it is. Please help

charlotte234s

Until a LEGALLY BINDING settlement is agreed to, she has full access to the home and belongings, and if you lock her out, she can press charges. Just because she no longer stays there does not mean she isn't entitled to the belongings or the apartment, it is half hers through marriage. Since she said she doesn't want it, it means that when the divorce is final, she doesn't care of you keep it.

Why do you not want to divorce? Obviously the marriage is unhappy. I don't think God wants people to live unhappily for their whole lives. Just my opinion though.

oneguyinohio

You need an attorney! Also, if the house is in both of your names, I think she has every right to do as she pleases. I know of one woman who smashed everything she did not take and the guy couldn't do squat. If she has told you that she wants a divorce, you have every right to file first even if you do not want the divorce, but to protect yourself financially... she left the house, but that doesn't mean that you will get off without having to pay her for her half of it...whatever equity there may be... your state may let you site irreconsilable differences, or an annullment if there are no kids... I believe she can even come in if you change the locks if the house is still in her name as joint property until you file and get some protection...

Perhaps an attorney can better advise you on what to file to restrict her from the house in your absence. As far as divorce being a sin, you can interpret the bible any way you please, but if you have ever told even a little white lie to make someone feel better... then that too would be a sin. Is one sin worse than another? Someone once told me that a person can go to hell for lying just the same as anything else. I think there are a lot of misconceptions about divorce and marriage. Many years ago, back in biblical times, there was no legal record of marriages or divorce. Todays marriage and divorce documents are money making instuments used by the legal and governing institutions as instruments to generate revenue. If our society wants separation of church and state, why not believe that what you do in our legal system does not impact the religious portion of your life.
You can also look at it as though you are honoring your marriage which was a commitment between you, your wife, and God til death do you part. Well, the death of that commitment has taken place and therefore the marriage has also died. All of the paperwork is totally separate from that, and is only a requirement of the state.

charlotte234s

Sorry, she has the legal right to her things and to come and go as she pleases.

Giving poor reputation just because you feel differently about an answer, when it was not offensive or meant to be rude, and did not give improper information is abuse of the rating system and will get you in trouble, so don't do that.

Ew, besides, I thought newbies, because they abuse the rating system so much, were only allowed to give neutral reputation points. What the heck?

ScottGem

Comments on this post

txlonglegs_69 disagrees: I just disagree on the grounds that she has left me I have to have rights of some kind

First, may I call your attention to the guidelines for using the comments feature found here:
http://www.askmehelpdesk.com/feedbac...ure-24951.html

You may not have liked Charlotte's answer, but its stil the correct one. Until a spearation or divorce agreement is in place she has access to the marital home. So you need to consult an attorney as to what your rights are.

charlotte234s

Thanks scottgem.

NowWhat

Okay, I am just going to start by saying that I do not know the legal side of this, but....

I would change the locks. Allow her to come and get her things as long as you are there.
Obviously, you aren't getting along, or you wouldn't be getting a divorce. Who's to say she won't come in and either take everything or destroy what she doesn't want.

This may be a legally incorrect answer, but I would protect yourself.

ScottGem

I'm sorry, but you should not be posting a legally incorrect answer. If he were to change the locks knowing that his wife was looking to pick up her things, he could be damaging his side in the divorce. This could have serious ramifications. The CORRECT way to protect himself is to take a FULL inventory of EVERYTHING in the house, with indications of what belongs to the wife, what belongs to him and what may be jointly held. Then, if the wife takes anything other than her possessions, he has a record of them. Another CORRECT way to deal with this is to consult an attorney who can advise what else he can do to protect his rights. This could involve filing a court order restraining the wife from entering the home without him present. In such a case he might be able to legally change the locks at that point.

But to advise someone to do something that could come back to haunt them is NOT helpful advice.

NowWhat

Actually it depends on what state you live in. In some states, you can change the locks once a spouse has moved out and expressed that they will not return.
So, depending on what state this person lives in, it could be very legal to change the locks. Because the property could stop being community property once the couple is seperated.

charlotte234s

Basically, she has the same rights as you have.

1) access to the house at all times, come and go as you please
2) ability to do with what you please items that are 100% legally yours
3) access to and use of all items jointly owned as a married couple.