I was sexually, emotionally and physically abused a couple of years back... by a family member
I never talked about it... I tried writing, crying, screaming just to let the anger out... but now all I thikn about is ending this... I'm suffering a lot
I'm constantly feeling angry, weak and sometimes I can't even get out of bed... I've been in denial for a whole year

I can't seek professional help... I can't talk about it... and it kills me that I have to act as if nothing has ever happened and just smile it off.

Aoife_C

As I just joined this website I came on her wanting to perhaps you know help someone in a way, small or big. This is what brought me to you. I feel utterly sad that a family member would violate you in any way at all. I cant say I know how you feel cause I never found myself in that position. Saying that, I would wish that you would be able to refrain from harming yourself. You might feel that you brought it upon yourself, but no matter what, you did not. Suicide, certaintly is not the answer, you may feel like you cant talk to anyone but even coming on here and letting out your feelings is some sort of a step isnt it? I'd love for you to be able to move on and promise everyone here that you'll look for help, professionally or even a close friend. I hope that you can get through this as no matter what there is at least five people out there that love you truly, even if they dont tell you all the time.

TheGentleman

Dont get me wrong about nay of this but i was in a situation were i was going to commit suicide and this stopped me.
Everything that happens of course hurt you and affects your life 24/7 but as much as it hurts taking your life isn tthe naswer. Im not a Very religious person but if you believe in god taking your life is a sin that will send you to hell than you'll live a enternity dealing with things you are now. But thats beside the point this is what i was told.
Yes you may commit suicide and people will cry and be sad but in the end they will get over it and move on with there lives. all you will be is just another person removed from history. Take all that pain and live your life have children of your own and spoil them so and maybe that will bring happiness. Its the only that will for me

flakyfart

i'm not for or aganist sucide, its a very personal thing and even though others believe that carrying on in the most dilapadted and destroyed condition is better than death i dont see things this way. I hate the pain you feel, as i hate my own pain. even more i hate that your reason for seeking death is becasue of another's actions. i deal with my own pain by inflicking it on others, (not through abuse) in creative ways. if you do decied to go, be considerate of others. people here will miss you. it isn't right to hurt them by not being there, also someone has to find your remains. that grusome decovery will scar another human being for life. even if its rescue personal. they never get over it. sucide just isn't practical. finding a way of living can be. imprace pain and that burns through you and find oncemore the searing beauty that surrounds you in the world. its there you have just forgotten how to see it.
best of luck

MWilken

I have tried to kill myself 4 times in this life and I realized, it takes a lot more guts to life this life as to kill myself and you have a lot of guts, more than I had, please do me a favor, file charges against the SOB, that person needs to be punished, please go to the police and yes please tell your family about it, you will be able to feel better about yourself after a while, I know you will never forget what happen to you, but time does heels wounds, no matter how long it takes, you will be able to smile again, you may believe me.

izumi_puppy

Dude dont do it.

its not reasable.