I lost my mother three days ago,although I am 40 years of old but cant cope with my mother lose ,I found her dead sitting in her chair after I returned from shopping ,so she was alone when died and this really scares me ,I feel that I never can deal with her absence,Im afraid to close my eyes and sleep because I might see my mother complaining from dying alone I have feelings of sadness and depression and I really need help.
Shakeh

valinors_sorrow

My condolences to you Shakeh and welcome to the motherless child club; it does get easier with time. Simply put, I missed my mom very badly until one day I looked down and saw that my hands were her hands and now I know she is with me in many ways.

Shakeh

Thanks for your kind words and sympathies...
Nearly two months passed since I lost my mother.. again I am missing her physical presence in every corner of our house and everywhere we were together and again that feelings of sadness and emptiness is back again ... ,I saw my mother several times in my dreams she was resting peacefully and many times told me that every thing is just fine and that you dont need to worry about me ,this is really good and I feel better now ..

pennybot

no matter what age you are, you had a mom you lost

*big hugs*

it must have been very heavy for you being the first one to discover her.
I'm so sorry for your loss of someone so close to you

It must feel at least some what relieving that she is telling you she feels at peace

BRiGRL

Hi..I dont know what it feels like to lose my mother...but I know what its like from my best friends point of view..
My best friend lost her mom almost two years ago to breast cancer...every night my friend would sleep on the couch which was close to her moms room so when she(my friend) woke up in the middle of the night she could check on her mom and the machines and such...Well one night my friend fell asleep..and when she awoke something bad had happened...the nurse told my friend and her family that her mom would have at the most a week to live...but her mom only lived for a few more hours...I was really close to her mom..my friend and I have been friends for over 11 yrs..we are both 18 now...But she blamed herself for her moms death because she had fallen asleep..but you cant blame yourself because nature took its course...yes you will miss you're mom greatly but just know that she is looking down on you everyday and she is by you're side in everything you do..I dont even like to think of losing my mom..it scares me to think that one day I wont get to call her or anything anymore...and no one is prepared for it..but like I said just know that she is there with you no matter what you do!! I hope this helped ease you're pain..even if just a little!!

Shakeh

thanks pennybot and BRiGRL for your sympathy ,it is nearly four month now lost my mother,Im crying everyday and sometimes realy dont understand how is life going on for me after my mothers death ,I was too attached too her altough im 40
Im missing her more and more ,and you want to Know the truth I dont want the time to pass,because I want to remain closer to my my mother memories Im afraid to lost them or to forget them ,I had a wonderful time with her,I just cant imagine to live the rest of my life without her.

aqua@home

You will never forget her. Some memories might fade while others might come to light, being triggered by something else. I think it is alright to grieve as long as you are still able to live your life. Your mother would not want you to be so sad. She probably spent most of her life trying to give you the best and making sure you were happy, now is not any different. I don't know your beliefs in the after-life, but I'm sure she is around you all of the time. You will get to see her again. She would want you to be happy. Cherish your memories and enjoy what time you are on the earth. If you have children, tell them about her. She will always be alive in your heart. Please don't feel guilty. She is definitely in a better place. Take care.

Shakeh

thanks aqua@home for your kind words.
Im christian i believe that there is a life beyond the phisycal body ,but this days sometimes I feel very sad that want to feel my mother to speak with her,Im missing her pyisical and spiritual presence that always was a comfort for me ,sometimes I want to join her to be near her whenever she is but I know I cant .
thanks for your symapthy it was a comfort.

aqua@home

You are welcome. When you feel that you want to talk to your mom, do it. She will hear you. God will hear you. You are not alone. I lost someone I was very close to a few years ago. I cried for months and months and months. It's okay to be that sad. It's not okay to feel that you want to join her. She would not want that. I think you need to talk to a professional. Please do not do anything drastic. If it is that bad then you should realize that must mean that it can only get better. Please pray and keep talking.

Krs

So you said yourself you believe there is a life beyond. The life your mum is in now.
So she is watching you, watching over you, you're gardian angel. She doesnt want to see her loved son crying for dismiss, she wants to see her son carry on forward but always with her in his heart
I know from experience.
It helps me get through each day.
My father is with me, everywhere i go.

valinors_sorrow

My father died yesterday, and my sister left a message at work (I am on vacation this week). So there is this odd feeling of ....so now I am on my own. Its all a part of it, the living and the dying. Take it in gentle stride, take it with some measure of grace, borrow some grace from those around you or from us here, if you find yourself short. Death makes life precious. Death makes life possible too. When I die, you can plant me under a patch of sunflowers.... that would do nicely.