why my boyfriend doesnt call me

sarahjan · #1 Oct 6, 2007, 01:03 PM

Hi, Can someone tell me why my boyfriend doesnt call me he used to call me alot and soon we are getting married but most of the time i am the one calling him he always makes excuses that he is bz working which i agree i know he works alot but still i am a bit confused i just want to know how men feel abt women cuz me as a woman can tell u guys that every minute i think abt him i wish to speak to him but i guess men don't think that way. When i get mad at him and i don't talk to him he doesn't bother to call me for like 3 days than after that he calls me and still says oh he is bz but he says he loves me very much but cant call me. What does that mean? Does it mean he really does care but he is busy or does it mean he doesnt love me very much plss advise

Wondergirl · Oct 6, 2007, 01:08 PM

Play his game. Do the same thing to him. Be as offhand about him as he is about you. See what happens.

What does "getting married soon" mean?

sarahjan · Oct 6, 2007, 01:13 PM

i did the same thing for like a day but im so impatiant i really have this problem that i cant wait for him to call me and u know what he takes forever to ring me oh yeah getting married lol i meant we have been together for long now and we are planning to get married soon but he seems different now what should i do

Wondergirl · Oct 6, 2007, 01:28 PM

Move on with your life. I don't know how old you are (16? 29? 45?) but get out there going to school, working, volunteering, singing, laughing, playing, being with friends, and slowly letting him fade out of sight.

Be good to yourself and stop spinning your wheels.

sarahjan · Oct 6, 2007, 01:35 PM

im 24 yrs old but i can never forget him tell me what is the best thing to get him back plsssssssssssssss

Wondergirl · Oct 6, 2007, 01:47 PM

But you will be doing exactly the wrong thing (to get him back) by being clingy and needy and whiny.

Develop yourself. Make yourself interesting. Add dimension to your life. Learn and mature. That's how you will get him back--or will find someone worthy of you.

sarahjan · Oct 6, 2007, 01:51 PM

so u think the best thing to do is NOT TO CALL HIM keep repeating that to myself and if he cares he will come back and be what he was before.... Hey if he call me shall i answer his call right away or shall i ignore his calls for a while and make him look for me and get him worried lol dono what to do but i really need a good advise thanks

Wondergirl · Oct 6, 2007, 01:57 PM

If he calls, talk with him for a short time. Be breezy and talk about what book you are reading, how your cat is driving you crazy, what you baked last night for fun, your new volunteer job and how excited you are, yadda yadda yadda. Don't ooze all over him. Don't tell him you miss him terribly. If he says he loves you, tell him you love him too, but ooops you have to get back to the laundry or the book you are reading or the cookies that are baking (or whatever)--because, just between you and me, you are busy too!!

sarahjan · Oct 6, 2007, 02:05 PM

thanks a million i think i should do what ur telling me and i really hope to get his attention back soon hey what if he just slowly forget me if i talk to him that way

Wondergirl · Oct 6, 2007, 02:08 PM

Isn't he already "slowing forgetting you"????? Why else are you asking for help?