Hi

Theres a woman at my office who i have worked with for around 7 months now and i am not sure if to take the plunge and to ask her out. We are always talking and i have managed to read the occasional body language. sometimes she will play with things in her hands while we're talking, she does always laugh at my jokes, even though im not very funny and alot of them are crap, whenever we do talk she does always look me in the eye, but it feels more like a stare as she rarely if ever loses eye contact, even when if a group of us are talking she will talk/look at me when talking usually always smiling even if its about a little thing. other than that however we don't really flirt to the extremems of playfully touching while flirting, other than our hands will brush, touch etc when passing each other stuff or resting on me while writing on a piece of paper but not to the extent of playfully hands on shoulders etc. I know that she does like me, but i cant decided if this is just as a work colleague/friend as we can have a laugh and a joke. However recently while casually talking in a group about people dating at work she said she wouldnt have a relationship at work again after a bad previous experience, i replied the same as i have also had a bad break up. A few days have passed since then and now at times she does seem a bit more reserved as in i may have put her off.

Is there something there or did she try to make it clear shes not interested by saying that she wouldnt date some1 at work again??? and where do you think i should go from here as i'd like to ask her out for a drink but she may find it weird after saying she wouldnt date some1 at work again?

thanks

YeloDasy

What about trying to be friends first?

grannyo

why not start by asking if she really meant what she said about no co-worker relationships? at least you'll know where she really stands..and she will know you're interested without both of you being made uncomfortable by specifics.

momincali

If you really felt that way about dating people you work with because of the bad breakup, why would you consider doing it again? Think it through. Dating someone you work with will almost always get complicated. Things go wrong and suddenly you desperately want to be looking for another job. Are you prepared to do that?

s_cianci

Ask her out for the drink - no harm in that. That doesn't mean you're "dating." Just take things slow and easy but steady. Keep in mind that both of you might not continue working there for the rest of your careers.

s_cianci

It sounds like they already are "friends."

YeloDasy

i meant friends outside of work.... they dont have to date right off the bat... they can hang out and see how they feel!

talaniman

She has made her feelings known. If you doubt it ask her directly and be prepared for the consequences or leave it alone and be happy to be friends. Friends do go out after work you know. Coffee ,drinks, get to know each other before you go risking your job. You don't have to go together or date to get to know one another. Keep it casual.