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Tell her how I feel or remain in "the friend zone"?
Hi everyone. So I have known this girl for around five years. Over the years we have grown to be close friends. She commonly calls me one of her best friends. However over the last year I have become increasingly attracted to her. Now it is to the point that I can't stop thinking about her. Every morning when I wake up I check my phone and see if she texted me. We work together so I see her all the time and cant take my eyes off her. I find myself going out of my way to be around her and even voulunteering for extra jobs if I know she will be nearby. But there is only one problem. He has had the same boyfriend for the last two years. The girl and I are in the same grade but her boyfriend is two years older and is away at college for much of the year. Whenever he comes home from college she sometimes cuts off communication with her other friends and allows him to keep her away from her friends. I'm also afraid I've already fallen into the dreaded "friend zone." But sometimes, especially when he isnt around or is away at college she seems to flirt with me. But I'm hesitant to believe if she is really flirting or if I am just reading too much into it because I like her sooo much. I dont know if I should ever tell her my true feelings or just try to wait out her current relationship. Any advice would be appriciated.
Thanks
she couldnt have been flirting with you .... cause she having a boyfriend ....i might be wrong but yet if she does flirt with you that mean she unfaithful and do you want a girlfriend like that ? >....
and yet my friend ..i am sorry that you might step in to the friend zone way before that now ....
she has someone already ... so i think you should just keep being friends wit her ^^ ....untill if they might break up ..or something then there will be you to catch her ..but in other wise ....keep yourself busy ..dating other girls ...and you will eventually take your mind of off her
You haven't slipped into the dreaded friend zone, that's where you've comfortably always been. It's not a punishment, it's a privilege. "If I can't have more, I'm going to look down on what I do have" is a horrible habit. Don't do that.
So, you risk ruining your privileged friendship if you speak of developing more with her. Also, you NEVER, NEVER, NEVER coax or offer cheating behavior, you don't offer it in your life and you don't tempt it in others. You don't do it. Period. Don't ever forget that.
Having said that, you CAN risk it, but you're risking everything. The friend zone position could quite easily be revoked, ok?
If you would rather stop being around her altogether because you "can't" control your thoughts/actions, then go ahead and tell her how you feel and you're interested in more with her if she's ever boyfriendless again.
Then, let the chips fall where they may. Good luck.
Ok, so I've read the other comments and all i have to say is that both have good points but I do disagree with JB in one aspect. It's that you're ruining your friendship by telling her that you have feelings for her. I think...and this is just an opinion...that she'll appreciate that you are being truthful and telling her that you have feelings for her. Like JB said don't provoke cheating because we all know that is wrong but give her the option. This way if she does like you she can break it off with her current bf or maybe she'll realize you're better for her than he is she just never thought she had the option. Also this way she might not flirt as much if she doesn't like you making it easier for you to get over her. Just don't forget if she truly thinks of you as her best friend she won't just drop you, she'll take your feelings into consideration. Good Luck!!
You keep it to yourself as she is a friend, and you work together. Respect she has someone else, and leave it alone.
If you think its hard to forget her now, just ask her for more than friendship, and see what misery really is.
I also suggest you have your own circle of friends, and activities you enjoy, and maybe you wont be as obsessed over one who is unavailable. This is tricky and you have much to lose so think carefully about what you do, and how you do it.
Hey man i had this exact same problem. Let me tell you that you should just tell her how you actually feel. She will probably think it is cute. But let me say it probably alot harder staying friends with her, if you could stop talking to her you would probably be of alot better and you would probably lose some of your huge crush. I told her and eventually she broke up with her boyfriend and we are currently dating, we were friends for about 5 years and she said yes to me immediately when i asked her. So i would tell her how you feel. Good Luck Man
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