[sphyncx]

All right I met these 2 girls at work when they came in to buy stuff. I happened to be where they needed the things they wanted so I helped them out, sporting conversation. Turns out the cuter one of the two... we'll name her Sally... is from IL (I'm from WI) and the other one... who we will call Amanda... is from New Jersy. They are both here for speed skating, and are training for the olympics here, but they are here in Wisconsin to stay here forever. So I ended up giving Amanda my number so they could call me later, which they did. So the next night me and my best friend go to the place they are staying at (like an apt) and just hang out, didn't do anything horribly exciting, but it was a fun night. Now I know they are both into me, but Amanda is kind of frowning because I'm into Sally instead... she's 18... and possibly acts like she's a little young as well. Anyway, Saturday night I make plans to just chill in Sally's apt, just me and her, and we ended up watching a movie, which we never actually did... just laid on her bed and talked. Everything was great... lot of eye contact, smiling, laughing, getting to know each other. Somehow we get on the subject of sex, and asks if I'm a virgin and I say "no but i was until i was 20, what about you?" (I'm 20 almost 21) and she said she was a virgin and that she isn't going to have sex until marriage. I'm like "that's cool with me, doesn't really matter" and she said "most guys say that until the time comes and then they are like 'come onnnnn'", I reply "well not me". Which is 100% true, I never was really into sex to begin with and it doesn't bother me at all. Out of no where somewhere down the line she says "do you think Amanda is cute?". I say "no not really..." and she replies "really? i think she is cute". Then after that she says, "I think you and Amanda would be better together, you don't know what you are getting yourself into, i'm a good girl". I'm like, "it really doesn't effect me". So I just straight up ask her if that was a feeble attempt to tell me I should get with Amanda and not her, and she says "well...no...but..." and wouldn't finish. However the rest of the night went just as well as it did the rest of the time.

Something I should be worried about? I think it might have been an indirect way of saying that 'hey you aren't getting sex, and I'm telling you this now before I get too close to you and anything else happens' sort of thing. Along with 'are you in it for being with me or just a relationship', since I know I could get with either of them.

One last thing...

Now I'm used to dating younger girls then I am, and Sally is 20 years old, but a month older. So what I'm about to explain is little off for me, I know it happens quite often when you are more mature and what not but I'm just not used to it.
We talked Sunday to make some plans for the week, and we should be going out weds. And she said she would give me a call weds. I'm not used to that at all, I'm used to talking to a girl like everyday, especially when things are new. What is your input on this? Taking it slow? This normal? Am I just nervous and worring over stupid things? Etc etc.

Thanks for your input in advance, and reading my life story... probably twice.

[Wildcat21]

I thin kyou have a good handle on this... she may have low self esteem and feel she isn't good enough for you. I think it also was a TEST to see if you like her.

Way to go in getting gthe number right away - that's half the battle my man.

I don't know about the sex thing - sounds like ANOTHER test. Be careful there - you could fall into the friend zone.

My advoce is quit coming on so strong - you're seeng and talking too much... ever hear about having a lady MISS YOU?? You shouldn't really be talking every day at this point.

[Wonder1984]

Yea sound right there wildcat.
You shouldn't think to mcuh at this point.
Just show her that you have other intressts... you know... so that you're an intressting person who she can do things.

Wonder

[Presleygall85]

Don't make the mistake of coming off all the way.. being a girl and all we like to feel beautiful and we like knowing you want us sexually just know your boundaries... she made her mind up that she doesn't want to have sex before marriage then don't push.. you sound like a descent guy and she probably sees that but girls know now days almost all guys want sex especially 20 year olds. Just keep on doing what your doing you sound like you have everything under control. If you miss her call her or text her.. just say hi wanted to hear your voice hope you having fun just little things.. make her feel special but you don't want to back out completely because this is the time when she is going to make up her mind about whether she wants to date or just be friends.. let her know you want to date! :) good luck.. your not going to need it but it is there for you! :)

[s_cianci]

I'd just play the field and have fun with the both of them. Don't put anything into these serious conversations. In fact, don't even have serious conversations ; just keep it light and fun. One thing though ; I wouldn't settle for making plans last minute, such as with going out on Wed. and then she says "I'll call you on Wed." If you put up with that they'll just give you the runaround. When you make a date, make it right then and there, period. If she says "I'll call you Wed.", you should reply with something like "Well, since you're not sure of your schedule for Wed. we'll make it some other time." Let her know that you respect your time, your time is valuable and you have a life. They'll be much more impressed by that than if you let them give you the runaround.

[talaniman]

She is very aware of your feelings for the other girl and is feeling you out to see if you're a player and really into her. Go very slow and get to know her and respect her wish not to have sex right away.