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I like my co-worker but she has a bf! what do i do?
Alright, recently I've been wondering what is going on at work. See I'm in my 20s, and this female co-worker is 4 years older than me. While we are at work together, she seems to flirt with the other co-workers and myself. After work, we sometimes text/call each other or sometimes grab something to eat or run errands. She only does this with me, and no one else at work. The conversations basically consist of normal everyday conversations. Now these conversations usually always take place while the bf is either gone working out of town for a few days. Or while he's asleep or working in another part of their house. They have been together for about 3-4 years, and are currently living together.
I really enjoy hanging out with this girl and talking to her, but I'm not sure what I should do. I would like to be more than friends, but I'm not sure what her feelings are about that. I'm pretty inexperienced with dating and I'm just wondering if she is just thinking of me as a good friend. I just don't understand what she's trying to tell me. It just feels odd that she would hang out with me while she has a bf.
I've met her bf and he's around 11 years older than her! That is a pretty big age gap in my opinion. I've only talked to him a few times but he seems normal and an ok guy. She talks about him a lot too when we are talking. She always seems to bring him up in one of our conversations either negatively or positively.
I just don't want to do anything that would make our current friendship get messed up.
Please, if anyone has any ideas on what I could do, please let me know!
Thanks
She is your friend and likes your company when the bf is not around. For you to think at this point that there is a romance here - there is no romance. Please don't keep thinking there is anythine more here than a friendship. Try and find your own gf and maybe the 4 of you can double date. Don't forgo a friendship with her as everyone needs friends.
I would say that you are setting yourself up for failure if you are trying to date this woman. There are plenty of women out there who are single and it might be a wise to look for someone other than your co-worker. Do you want to come between her and her boyfriend? In my opinion, I would remain friends but not go any further than that. If you like the qualities that she has then remember them and try to find someone with those qualities.
Leave it as is is. She might just enjoy having a friend. You said her flirty behaviour is not exclusive with you at work.
She probably just feels more relaxed in talking to guys because she is not considering any dating situation because she is already with someone. She isn't hiding the boyfriend.
If you cant keep the boundaries clear, better take a few steps back away from the border.
You might be pretty close to crossing a line that you shouldn't.
Ok, after I read what you all have posted, I've been able to think more about this, and I knew that i was only just her friend and I was just making sure that I wasn't missing something she was trying to tell me. I've just been wondering why I'm the special one at work that she actually hangs out with and talks to outside of work. I think she knows that I sorta like her, but for her it seems that she likes that attention. I do not want to come between her and her bf. Lots of people talk to her about her situation and give her crap on how much older her bf is than her. These other co-workers tell her that her relationship isn't going anywhere...I'm not sure why they say that but it just seems that she complains about him sometimes. But i know that all relationships have trouble spots.
Other people at work keep asking us if we're dating now since we hang out on occasion.
I don't know, I think I'll just be a good friend, and maybe wait and see what happens
alright, well lately we've been hanging out more now, and we've been talking alot more on the phone. Her bf is gone for the weekend and instead of texting me she's been calling me, and i've been calling her. Our conversations tho have gotten really lame tho lately. We will talk on the phone and then we'll change subjects every sentence. She'll talk about something on tv, and then i'll bring up something else, and same goes both ways. I dont mind it much, but once we're done thinking of stuff to talk about we just sorta end the conversation in an awkward way. I don't know...i guess i'm just looking for advice on how to make our conversations more exciting and so we both don't get bored.
yes i know, but right now i'm happy with being friends, i'm just wondering how i can make our conversations alittle bit more normal and not so awkward. It's like we run out of stuff to talk about.
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