I'm seeing a married man. Is he using me?

Here is one way to think about it: If you are seeing a guy who is willing to cheat on his partner, then he may very well cheat on YOU later. So stick with guys who are willing to make a commitment to YOU.

How do you get him out of your system? Use the truth to get him out. What is the truth? He is using you, you are sloppy seconds and will never be truly important in his life. He doesn't love you and he cheats on you with his wife.

If that doesn't convince you, I don't know what will.

Begin to care enough about yourself to not be used. Are you more than a vagina? That is what you are to him. When you get tired of being that, you will respect yourself enough to leave him alone.

I am going to suggest you treat it like an addiction and get help. You have already made a first step by coming here and we will do all that we can to help you, but you need to see someone who can back up their advice with verbal and physical interaction. Eye contact and having someone hold your hand can help reinforce your resolve to move forward.

You know what you need to do. It isn't going to be easy, but you do have support available. You can also become your own best form of support if you give yourself a chance.

Don't expect everything to be 'fixed' overnight. It will take time and you will think about backsliding and contacting him. However, you will survive and make it through this if you give yourself support.

There is a method for moving forward from a break up called No Contact. It is a 'cold turkey' way of letting go. Tell him that you are letting him, the relationship and everything else go. Stop all contact with him. Do not accept any contact from him. Delete messages, his phone number, de-friend him on any social websites, send emails to the spam folder and do not look at them, etc. If you can think of a way you might be tempted to contact him, block it. It may hurt, but it will help you keep confusion down to a minimum.

At the same time, get involved in your life. Catch up with friends and family you might have let go while seeing him. Hobbies, volunteering, continuing education classes, clubs, working out, etc. can give you ways to keep your mind and body occupied so you are less likely to try to contact him.

Good luck.

He only comes for sex, so stop giving him sex and he will stop coming! Let me know if we need to get harsher, and provide cyber slaps as maybe you need something stronger to wake you up!

Treating this as an addiction was a great idea. Maybe you need some extra, in person, face to face support, and guidance!

I read your other threads. You are in this quandry and yet you recommend dating a married man when someone else asks the question? It's not about girl power. It's about self respect.

It's also not "girl power, you go girl" when you are participating in hurting another female in this manner. http://www.askmehelpdesk.com/dating/...te-452392.html

"Girl power" and "I'm sleeping with your husband" don't belong in the same sentence.

Girls stay in a relationship like this. Mature WOMEN leave.

I think there may be a misunderstanding. From reading the other posts by flower, I got the impression she was supporting the ops of the other other threads in moving on or dating men other than their married boyfriends. She was not advocating dating the married men or did I miss something?