Question
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Jul 13, 2008, 08:17 PM
| | New Member | | Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 4
| | | Im dead to him all of the sudden? Why? Ive been trying to get over my ex for years. I keep messin up by going back to him over and over again but Im done this time. I feel stupid because I hung out with him on the 4th of july and we slept together. We talked the next day but all of the sudden he just stopped talking to me. I know it seems like a booty call but I dont know what to think right now. I talked to him that thursday of that week which was his birthday and I asked him why he ignored me and he told me he just didnt feel like talkin. I asked him if I did something wrong and he said no. He also told me that he is leaving out of state for college so he basically doesnt wanna get attached to me and that he still cares but ya know. He told me he loved me but then that was it. I havent talked to him in 3 days so far and thats strange because we talked every day. I wanna text him but I know he wont text back, I wanna call but he wont answer. I have wrote him a fare well letter but he wont respond. Its like Im dead to him and I cant change it. I just dont understand.. It hurts me because I went back to him when he broke my heart every time and has hurt me. I feel used and hurt all over again and I just wanna know why. Why is he just ignoring me like this? See I wanna be the strong one here, I want him to be texting me and wondering why Im not talking to him but I dont know how to turn it around like that. I mean I wanna be the one to open my phone and just delete a message from him with not a care in the world. But I guess I just need to realize thats probably not gonna happen for me. I dont know what to do really. I guess move on and let go but its harder than it seems, like I said I have been trying to get over him for 3 years. How do you just drop someone you cared so much about? I cant do it. Please if anyone out there can help me on this I would really appreciate it Im killing myself, I just wanna be happy and right now Im pretty low. Please.... I need help on this one!! | | | | | | |
Answers
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Jul 13, 2008, 09:26 PM
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#2
| | Ultra Member
Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Where it rains too much!
Posts: 1,721
| You should do No Contact with him. Read the stickies at the beginning of the relationship section.
The one thing you have never done in your relationship with him is to leave him alone entirely. Go for it. |
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Jul 13, 2008, 09:33 PM
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#3
| | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2008 Location: Manila/Pasig/Antipolo, PHILS
Posts: 858
| U keep on looking back so thats why. If u keep on contacting and "subtlely" insisting yourself to him, thats what you will always feel. Dont be surprised. USED, HURT, USED, REJECTED, USED, FOOLED, USED, USED, USED, USED, USED, USED...... |
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Jul 14, 2008, 04:17 AM
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#4
| | Software Expert
Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: (Call me JB) Bakersfield, CA
Posts: 3,370
Pay to call JBeaucaire for advice ($.75/min) | You're not confused. You know exactly what's going on, don't you? You're not confused, your moping.
Booty call, yes, you made him your booty call. I bet he feels used, too.
You want to do better, then describe "better" meaning he is chasing you and are snubbing him? That's BETTER? No honey, that's emotional revenge. That's a worse goal than anything else you could be wanting, so it's no wonder you're not healing.
The closest thing to love is hate. Revenge is a hate reflex, so you are still completely involved with guy emotionally. Healing comes when you stop pursuing the love OR the hate. You embrace the "oh well", you embrace the "whatever" attitude. That's the path to healing.
NO CONTACT is the path (and keep your clothes on, too), but it will be pointless if you sit alone thinking about him over and over. This makes no more sense for you to do than if you sat at him crying because Brad Pitt doesn't love you back. It's the same thing.
He's ignoring you because he's trying to be more honest than you are. It's over, he doesn't want to be your booty call, he doesn't want to text you and have you delete it, he's got the right idea!
Now you get the right idea, too. Spend some time pining over Brad Pitt. It's more likely to help than what you've been trying. And then, after that, any of the 1000s of other available men that haven't told you to "go away"...I say throw some energy in their direction next. |
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