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I'm 11 and im in love with a 16 year old can i date him?
ok..
I'm 11 years old and I'm in love with a 16 year old.
Can I date him without one of us getting in trouble?
We dont want to have sex.
We just want to hangout,hold hands, hug and a kiss every now and then,
Thats all.
What do I do?
I love him soo much and he loves me back.
Can i date him?
I agree with nearly everything I have heard here, except that 11 year old don't know what love is. True, they don't know what "true love" or "sould mate" or anything to that effect is. Not at this point.
The age difference is vast, and would not be a good idea. I don't think either of your parents would approve.
My "first love" and I were both 11 when we started "dating". We didn't hold hands until we were 13, didn't share a kiss until we were 14, and didn't have sex until we were 17. We were together until we were 20.
My point is this, 11 year olds are not COMPLETELY clueless about love.
I know that most of you may disagree with me, but I just wanted to share my point of view. But please avoid the "reddies" and just quote me and tell me why you would disagree.
On the other side, Honey, you are young. DO you parents even allow you to date? I doubt they would approve of a 5 year age difference. And in alot of states, more than three years under the age of 18, is illegal and is still considered statory rape.
Just worry about school and your friends...not boys.
You have got to be kidding. A 20 year old in love with a 14 yr old is sick! You are from 2 different worlds. You don't have the experience to truly know what love is. And a there can only be one thing that interests a 20 yr old in a 14 yr old.
Where are your parents. How do they feel about this. Where did you meet this freak?
I disagree, I dated a 23 year old when I was 15. My parents introduced me to him, they absolutely adored him. He never tried to take advantage of me, or push me into doing something I wasn't ready for. Sex was not the only thing he was interested in. We've been great friends now for 6 years, and still date on and off. (since we live in separate cities it's quite impossible to have a serious committed relationship at the moment) But I still feel as strongly for him now as I did when I was 15.
In addition my parents, who have been married now for 34 years, started dating when My mother was 15 and my father was 23. My grandparents, who were married for 71 years, until their deaths, began dating when she was 15 and he was 23.
So it is not sick, and can be a truly loving relationship. But you do have to be careful. We waited till I was ready, and legal, until we finally had sex. And although that was simply our decision if you do truly love someone and they return that love then waiting should be your only option. Otherwise the risks you take are severe. If he's not willing to wait then he doesn't respect you, your decisions, or your feelings, and no respect= no love.
I disagree, I dated a 23 year old when I was 15. My parents introduced me to him, they absolutely adored him.
Maybe this is a cultural issue. Maybe you and your parents come from a culture that looks on such relationships differently. I really can't imagine any American parents allowing a 15 yr old child to date a 23 yr old man. Frankly I can't imagine what a 23 yr old man would find in common with a 15 yr old child (except the obvious).
So while you can disagree with me as is your right, I stand by my advice here. The odds are so great that an adult male involved with adolescent female is exploitive if not pedophilia that I don't think such a relationship should be condoned in the slightest.
ScottGem,
Nope, we are American. But people mature at different rates. I experienced things growing up that led to me maturing much earlier than most teenagers. But we had plenty to talk about, we listened to the same music, watched the same movies, had the same interests, had very different political views which led to interesting political arguments. (because you can't have everything in common with someone for a relationship to work, in my experience) Being with him was fun, exciting, and educational, for both of us. There's never a dull moment between us. So it is possible for people with that great of an age difference to be more than just physically attracted to each other.
I didn't mean for my post to be advice. It was simply me relating to the posters. I certainly don't give the advice to date someone with such an age difference at such a young age. But it is a touchy subject as there are plenty of cases like mine. You just have to be careful in these situations. You have to really know and trust someone (and even then it's still risky as in most rape cases the victim is raped by someone they know and trust) If someone is in this situation the best thing is to let your parents know where you are at all times, don't go behind their backs and lie to them. If they're not ok with you dating an older person then maybe that's a sign that the relationship isn't meant to work out. Find someone more your age until you are old enough to date this person. Trust me, if it's really love, the feelings will still be there years down the road. But letting your parents know where you are and who you're with keeps you safe, and your safety is more important then puppy love.
There are exceptions to every rule. I'm sure there are situations where a 15 yr old might be very mature and the 23 yr old not as adult. But such situations are few and far between. By talking about a successful relationship you are, indeed, giving advice that such a relationship is OK, no matter what caveats you put on it.
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