At Ask Me Help Desk you can ask questions in any topic and have them
answered for free by our experts. To ask questions or participate in
answering them you must register for a free account. By registering you
will be able to:
Get free answers from experts in any of our 300+
topics.
I am a nice guy. I've been told by many, and I believe myself that I am a 'nice guy.' People also tell me that I am 'whipped.'
I don't think I am whipped, I just enjoy spending time with my girlfriends, and I am willing to do favors for them, and help them out with anything, as any good boyfriend should be.
So, where do we draw the line? When is one 'whipped?'
AND
How does one avoid getting 'whipped?"
I mean, I want to help out my girlfriend. But, I don't want to become whipped, which apparently happens to me all the time.
I personally don't even think there is such thing as 'whipped.' But, what are your opinions on this topic?
As long as YOU are happy being with your gf and do not feel she is using or abusing you then you are not whipped and they are just jealous. So don't worry about what other say or think.
do you make time for yourself? do you actually find time to do these things YOU enjoy, not because you enjoy things with her, but because YOU do? Such as..certain movies, certain foods, possibly going to the gym, etc?
do you find time to hang out with your friends? do you find yourself constantly dropping your friends or not spending enough time with them because of the girl?
do you find yourself always doing what SHE wants to do, not what YOU want to do?
there's a difference between being "whipped" and being nice. Make time for yourself, for your friends, do things you enjoy, eat things you want...don't succumb to every wish of your girl...as this often ends in you getting the raw end of the deal and asking yourself, "I did everything for her..."
I admit I do things that only she enjoys. With my last girlfriend, I did spend time with her when I should have been with my friends (i.e lunch everday). I did lose touch with some friends during the relationship too.
One of the things you said, ISneezeFunny is that there is a difference between being 'whipped' and being nice. I definatly want to remain a 'nice guy.' I want to know where the line between nice and 'whipped' is. I guess as long as I don't forget friends, and leave time for myself, I'm good, right?
And N0Help4u, I wouldn't even stay with a GF who 'abuses' me. But I see what you mean by jealousy. My one friend who hasn't had a girlfriend in 3 years was the main person who called me 'whipped.' I really didn't care what he thought, but it did make me think.
I think you most definitely should leave some quality time for your friends, not to mention yourself. I know where you're coming from. I used to be that guy...I spent every dinner with my girlfriend, spent every weekend with her, etc. When our relationship ended, I realized I shut off most of my friends, and I didn't do ANYTHING I enjoyed for the past 3.5 years.
Don't be that guy. be there for your girl if you can. if you can't, she's a big girl...she can handle herself. go hang out with your buddies once or twice a week, and leave time for yourself two to three times a week. Even if it's not going somewhere, but maybe going to the gym...sitting around at home watching a show you like, maybe even just sitting in your room listening to music...we all need our own time; I realized this really late, and just now realizing how important that truly is.
Thanks, for helping me realize that now. I am only 16, and I'm sure I will have many more relationships in the future. I think if I follow your advice (to give time to myself, buds, etc.) that my future relationships will be much more enjoyable.
If I'm lucky, I can find a girl with common interests. That way we can do things together that WE enjoy. Of course, I'll still leave time for me and friends.
I guess ultimatly, as long as I am happy, I am not 'whipped'.
There's nothing wrong with being "whipped" if your relationship is a mutually beneficial one. There are SO many kinds of people, a guy dating a "needy" girl may need to be a leadership type, a guy dating a controlling girl may need to be "whipped" to be happy together.
Dating is about finding someone you're compatible with in a way that makes sense. Most of your relationships will end because this is simply not true. Have fun in the meantime until it becomes evident you can't be happy being "whipped" by the girl you're dating.
My wife of 23 years is VERY independent. In many parts of our life together I would describe myself as "whipped" to her control, and she would disagree, hehe. In other ways, I take the lead.
It's all about balance. Happiness isn't about the girl you're with, it about how you feel about YOURSELF and the life you're leading, including how you are with the girl. It's about you. Being whipped is fine if everything is working well.
Linear Mode
